Now I can fathom
My dog’s excitement
When I came home every day.
Imagine, if you will,
You are my dog,
Sitting in a room
With no sounds
But the rumble of passing cars outside.

There is a stop sign in front of my house
So each car slows, stops,
The rumble grows quiet,
And even though
It’s common knowledge
That there is a stop sign in front of my house,
Still the dog’s heart jumps into its throat,
And escapes in a hesitant bark,
The dog is thinking
“Finally! The best person in the world
Is home!”

But the car revs up
And continues down the road.

The dog feels hungry,
He hears the cat having sex
With another cat next door.
He hates that cat so much.

Over again and again
The hope throws itself into the air
Only to drop below the hell of his stomach.
No matter how many cars pull up,
My dog’s ears prick aloft
And his tail wags -

- Only to drop again.
The refuted yearning
Hurts him just as much
Every time,
Yet he can’t seem to ignore the sounds
Of the devil cars outside.

He hears one engine stop.
He rises, looking at the window,
Runs to it, paws at it,
Barks in ecstasy
Looking for me earnestly
“Bark bark bark!
Bark bark bark bark,”
Go his mouth and his heart!

…But the girl and little brat next door
Slam the doors,
The mother throws the keys to the father,
And the father drives the car away.

My dog cries as he realizes
I’m still not home,
His whimpers echoing on the glass.
It’s forever, and his tail curls
Under his legs,
He walks off the couch,
His nails clack on the floor,
The only sound in a lonely house.

He lays on the ground
And tries to sleep,
But the cat starts
To fuck its friend again.
My dog stuffs his head
Into the sofa
To blot out the cruel din.
Not just disgusted,
He is jealous of the cat
For having someone she loves
When I am still not home yet.

When
Will I ever come home?
He curls up to make himself small,
His heart hurts
Swollen with missing me.

That was over five years ago
But all I’ve said is still true.
Now the house has changed
But not the stop sign,
And when I say my dog
I really mean me.