You live in my cavities 

You haunt my dreams

No matter how hard I try, 

You are there.

I can feel your arms wrapped around me

I can feel our noses gently kissing

I can feel our bodies creating a sensational heat

And as much as I love reliving this beautiful moment,

my dream is a living nightmare.

For me, this was love

But for you, this was merely just sex.

I want to relive this,

but without the goodbye

Because not having you in my life,

is killing me

I battle every night of the thoughts of taking a knife

and wanting to shred my arms

To remind myself 

I am alive 

Because when I was with you,

I lived in the moment 

no worries