Fri, 05/22/2020 - 23:36 --

detached from myself I need

another to fill me

still alone but useful

still alone but in the center


each action has a reaction

giving each move a purpose

a reason

a care


other is important

body is not

body is 



too hard to be in myself

too scary I presume

a body that only provided torment

so why be in it?


I want to be the fuel of another

the touch is the gift

the validation is the goal

the codependency is... 


It is all like a vessel almost

or service

without it I whither

or drown


Whichever it is I cannot handle it much

and it hurts to be with myself

never went a full day

without leaving myself


Almost feels like codependency is my disease

a sickness




I want it but

I don't

but I do

but I know I shouldn't


someone to look at me and feel full

because I feel oh so empty

to get something from me

that I cannot get from myself


In a weird middle-ground where

boundaries exist

but love does not

for my withering vessel


In reality it does not whither

it fights

but inner core just hurts and

fighting hurts


Rather fight for others than

for me

it wounds me and codependency

puts a rainbow Band-Aid on it


but the wound is still there

and it scars

This poem is about: 


Annette M Velasquez

YES! This is so eloquently expressed, honest and authentic. The emotional element, and descriptions are accurate, raw and straightforward. Please look up my poem: Co-dependency, Overcoming it is under my name and list of poems on this site... I think you'll like it. Remember, codependency is like an addiction, difficult and painful- but there is healing, change, help and a better way!

Thank you so much for your comment! I will look at your poem

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