I felt the pain increase

dizzying

woesy

 

It was snowing outside

The snowflakes big and wet

While I lay in the uncomfortable bed

 

The cream colored plastic railings

Had buttons of different colors on them

The white sheets contrasting

 

It christmas eve, and I am stuck here

Here with nothing but pain and sickness surrounding me

Wishing me a merry fucking christmas!

 

My parents walk into the room

Carrying a colorful box with a red bow

When I see the package i fill with excitement, the pain dulling

 

I had not been expecting them

But it was good to see them, they made the pain go away

If only temporarily

 

They hand me the big box

And like the five year old i am

I shake it and try and figure out what it is

 

Open it, my mom calls out to me

Doing as she says, like i always did

I tore through the festive wrapping paper

 

Tearing off the cover

I throw it across the room

And i see a pair of black new shiny boots look at me

 

They’re just like santa’s i scream

so excited that i just cant contain myself

They were santas boots, my very own christmas boots

 

The pain left entirely replaced by faith

calming

believing