The Captain

When the acute insatiable hunger beckons

You, my friend, are where my thoughts travel.

And as they unravel, my stomach babbles

Its demand for attention, its need to be satisfied.

You are my staple,

My declaration to the world that I am capable

Of being an independent,

My proof of self-sustainability.

Captain Crunch.

Oh Captain, my Captain, you need no caption

For all of your greatness needs no further text.

And I have come prepared for you,

With my bowl and my spoon,

Oh Captain, we shall be one soon.

My body yearns for you with the burning desire of a thousand suns,

But fear not my sweet necessity,

The cool creamy river of goodness will put out these flames soon.

In this bowl we shall all become one.

You my Captain, will always be first of course.

And into the bowl you tumble down,

An avalanche of crunchy bliss in which I will drown

My taste buds in glorious mouth-gasms, over and over again.

You are next milk,

Do not be so wet, I have not forgotten you my friend.

Slowly, I pour you in ever so slowly.

But my attention is reverted back

To all of the glory that is my Captain.

And I watch as your first,

Your second,

Your 37th mate rises up to attention.

And you Captain, float as you should, the commander of your vessel.

But I cannot admire you for long,

for your ships are sailing good sir.

And you must live up to your title Mr. Crunch.

And spoonful by spoonful,

You are everything I could have ever hoped for,

All that I've ever needed.



I started reading this poem and I was ready to read somethign about being thh captain of yoru own life or something. I am nt disappointed, this is the fist thing I have laughed at in a long time! I love it :D


Thanks so much!! I thought people could use a bit of comedic relief :,) lol

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741