A year ago today...

365 days ago today...

I believe I was sitting next to my mothers hospital bed

Watching her breathe through a tube.

 

I was only a junior then, my mother had been there with me through everything

Now to see her lying there. so hopeless

Lifeless.

 

I was always taught to put my faith in God whenever times got a little rough

But where was God at now?

Why did it feel like I lived in a black hole?

 

7 days.

I watched her lifeless body lay there for 7 days.

Family would come and go but the apin never seemed to leave...

It slowly became my best friend.

 

I wrote my feelings down in this litle journal

'Cause it was too awkward to talk about the situation at hand

Too awkward to cry in front of everyone

Too awkaward to even let a smile slip from my face

 

Hearing doctors say "not many people live after something like this happens" is hard.

Like, very hard.

No one understood how hard it was for me to act like I'm okay.

As if I was numb to the pain.

 

When her eyes finally opened

It felt as if the weight of the world was finally off my shoulders...

I could finally breathe again

After all this time

 

My rock was back.

I could finally cry.

This time, not because I was sad

But because I could finally

Breathe again.