Because We Love

Amanda Aman

 

Love is conflicting like April weather

An incessant downpour sequenced by rainbows and delicate sunrays

Like love, the sky surrounds us and knows no boundary

As children we learn to observe and mimic the demonstrative shadow of those we love first

A sunny afternoon, a mother's embrace

A lucky charm, a father's encouragement

Yet we are not all exposed to the same, blissful conditions

The quality of love we are exposed to as children gives us gifts and scars we reflect upon

Gifts and wounds that inflict upon our development as a lover and friend

For after we grow we being our search for new hands to hold

Now we seek friendships

We fall in love with shared laughter and the michevious twinkle in our eyes

With the pounding in our chest as we frolic through an open field, wrapped up in the fantasies of imagination

We braid each other's hair and giggle about the cute boy across the street

Followed by bickering about silly nonsense that at the time seems bigger than the world around us

Or the switching schools or the distance that pulls at the thread of our first friendship

Oh the dear old friend who wanders through your mind, but you later learn to cope with the pain and to branch out to new beginnings

You begin to notice the social changes and oh so jolly youth crumble before your eyes

Your new friendships are not built on similar toy preference

Yet they seed from shared experiences and emotional turmoil

We seek the pain in ourselves in others to feel a sense of understanding

Yet little do we know the pain we are feeding by giving it our precious time

A long with peer relations

You are intrigued by a possible budding romance and find yourself falling for the "perfect companion"

A romance that begins with back and forth texts of silly, flirtatious remarks and romantic subtleties

You are inexperienced yet it is your duty to fall in love, even stumble, and discover the pros and cons of romance

The continious flutter in your chest after your first kiss that we wouldv'e never thought of due to the prolonged stage of cooties

Simple displays of affection and heartwarming gestures that cause you to swoon

Holding hands and strolling through the park, ignoring the rainfall

But eventually they become distant

Lies begin to bubble over

You ask yourself; "Am I being to sensitive?"

A stampede of screaming, fighting, boiling tears

Your heart aches immensely

Because a long with the agony screams the memories you are oh so fond of

The feeling of never wanting to leave behind a moment of such happiness

Despite any internal confliction, the relationship comes to an end

But the love does not for it lingers on your skin, causing you to be wary

Something we overlook is the lesson we are provided with

For it is quiet underneath the hurt and takes time to reveal itself

Because you loved them, you did not just undergo pain

Because you loved them, you experienced pains and pleasures and grew thicker skin

You are 18 now

You have been through a series of friendships and relationships which may of all differed, but each in which solidified the ground you walk on

You have experienced the winds of a hurricane and the startling pull of the ocean, yet you are still able to enjoy the sunset

Through the ups and downs of either kind of relationship, you have begun to uncover a valuable life lesson, the most important relationship

Because you love your family, you have learned patience and unconditional love

Because you have loved friends, you have learned the simply joys of laughter and to always seek positive similarities and interests

Because you have loved romantically, you have learned what makes you feel important and what qualities to seek in a partner

Because you have loved in a variety of ways

Because you are discovering the truths of love

You are finally learning to love the most important person of all

Yourself