Welcome to the mind of the twisted minded

Depression took him over, now he is blinded

From what he can remember he was always depressed

The only pride he carried was the hair on his chest

Now it all started as a sophomore in high school

Where the fat were shamed and the skinny held rule

Now everything was alright and cool

Until he met a girl that made him drool

He tried to be cool

Get her attention in school

But his precious jewel

Only saw him as a fool

All of his life, he felt so alone

Took a razor to his arm, now he’s suicide prone

His pain is relieved by the flow of red

All he can hear was the demons talking in his head

His heart feels cold and his soul was dead

He only felt pain, so his hopes were never fed

 

Fast forward a few months in,

Life was good but let the pain begin

He was on a mission

Steady fishin

In a search for himself

No one to count on, no one for help

And when he began to grow

He got broken by a hoe

His dad cheated on his mom

Now his mind is a time bomb

Mom got depressed so she ran away

He punched holes in the wall, his mind was in haze

The way he forgave his dad to me will never cease to amaze

Even though inside growing was his silent rage

So once again, he’s cutting to feel better

Cause no one really taught him how to deal with bad weather

His mom lost 60 pounds in a month

Because his dad decided to be a fucking little cunt

Now his mom is behind closed doors steady crying

Her boy listens to the cries so his heart is steady dying

Now he thinks about going for a toke

And slitting his father’s fucking throat

 

Let’s hop again, to a few months up

Thought he found a girl that could lift his soul up

Looks like he must have been sipping from the red cup

Wake up and stop listening to your fucking nuts

He thought “oh she’s everything I need”

But she’s the reason he’s fucking up and smoking weed

He got cheated on but he always stayed

Always in the game, always fucking played

He was too fat to even get fucking laid

So he smoked good just to fade away

 

He met a girl, her name was Mary Jane

She was the only one who knew how to cope with the pain

Her love to him was as sweet as sugar cane

Since he was always with her, life began to fade

He left his girl for her

You think he left happy you infer?

No, he returned with regret on his mind

When she left him for someone, his rage made him blind

Now he’s up, crying and thinking

He just can’t stop cutting and drinking

His life is over, but he didn’t know he was sprung

He didn’t realize that this life hasn’t been done

That he could grow strong and the war hasn’t been won

So he splits his arm open

His tears keep him choking

He passes out, with his arm still bleeding

His parents walk in while his life was depleting

They run in, try to close the opening

Their son is going to die from alcohol poisoning

 

Wake up, dazed up at the hospital, doped and confused

Asking “why didn’t you just hand me my noose”

Woke up still crying, still feeling high

Looks to his parents and admits he just wants to die

He couldn’t take his miserable life

Always home, always alone, thinking of life

Still fat, still unwanted, holding his knife

His arm slit, it seems fit, let the blood rain

That’s the only way he knew to release the pain

Until he decided, I’m done being a lame

But what he didn’t know is that would drive him insane

He only had one thing in his mind and that was stuntin

He started doing drugs and had a desire for money

So he started selling that which he consumed

Everyone knew what’s up when he walked in the room

This would lead to his certain doom

It was roll up, spark up, and smoke the fumes

Without knowing, his ego started taking over

Thought he was hot like a super nova

Thought the drugs and the girls would never end

So he ended up fucking the ex of his best friend

That was the end

His position he could not defend

He ended up losing one of his closest friends

His friend, the one who helped him make it through

You had no self-control, you made a bad move

He wants him back so badly, cause now he’s a stranger

He was the only one there when his life was in danger

 

He doesn’t know how to deal with the things he was dealt

So now his only comfort are the voices from hell

Yea, déjà vu, does this ring a bell?

He’s back to the insanity that consumed him the first time

Yet all he can say is “trust me, im fine”

Hes all out of hope

So he turned to the dope

His grades dropped like a slope

You asked if he knew his future, he would respond with a dead, simple “nope”
he was stuck

His life was fucked

The devil started to mock

Demons on his cock

He has no idea of how to make it stop

So to this day

He hopes and prays

That god would come down with a knife

To end his life.

 

-Sorry to anyone I’ve hurt due to my recklessness. I’m on the road to recovery.