I felt my stomach churn when I wrote the words, like the ashes from your cigarette. Mainly because it was the first time that I successfully used a meaningful symbol in one of my poems. The poem just wouldn't work without it. It described my unspoken feelings towards one of my close friends and how we've always had the same broken mentality about relationships. We have unrealistic expectations of people and when we get let down, we turn to self-destructing tactics (and each other) in order to relieve ourselves from the loneliness and sadness.