"Come here child, let's play a game"
She'll respond with a quiver in her voice,
"Why do we play when everyone goes away?"
''There is more fun, it's always going to be you and me...
now come, watch this video it's fun, you'll see"
The child turns her head away in mere disgust
How is she to know, to see the wrong this person does
She wants to leave but he locks her arm tight
She wonders if she needs to obey...
"Don't turn away, I said watch it till the end!"
Frightened as she is, she follows his command
in full oblivion to his disgusting reprimand
The first touch on her skin brings a shiver up her spine
The traumatic feelings she will not forget,
no matter the time that passes by
Her childhood gone,
Her happiness set aside
She weeps, as she can no longer feel her legs from inside
The minutes feel like hours
The pain, as if someone stabbed her with a knife
Her thoughts clouded, as the night crawls by
As she lay there to go to bed,
she turns the other way, facing the wall
She tells herself to ignore the whisper in her head...
"I am only eight years old and I have learned that to touch,
You feel your emotions dwell inside,
not with pleasure but with disgust"
As she grew older, she could not hold the urge
The pain, the fear
It took full control over her
a life no longer desired
Nothing had changed
memories grew broken
worse than twisted wires
As if things could get worse...
It is as if God has laid upon her,
one damned miserable curse
She could not see, let alone feel
She couldn't come to understand how a person could be so sinister,
To this day, she cannot come to understand why it was done
Such a perversive act,
One that changed the person she could have been destined to live
THE PERSON THAT SHE COULD'VE CLAIMED TO BECOME
Her life is lived in agony, lived in full despair
Wondering if things will get better,
but time is scarce
Will she ever find good in herself, surely she must
Sadly, the gold in her heart seems to diminish into dust
She sits there, tears stinging her eyes
2 AM thoughts
Because it's always on her mind
Her mother remains clueless
continuing to call her rebellious, reckless and wild
Unaware of the damage done by her own son
while her daughter, remains the insignificant child
Why do things take such a sudden turn
Once a naive overjoyed child, then...
Then the weight of the world thrown upon her fragile shoulders
Silence is the only method that keeps stabily, in a way,
Do not speak, there was nothing you could do
all those words one could not bring themselves to say
The memories... despised lie deep inside
at least up until this very day
"There is more pain in holding on''
Something I always heard, but never realized
not until I released the shame
One more chance,
An opportunity, where I was guided by a friend
After so many years of torture and restless nights
Came a person on whom I could depend
One thing I have for certain,
My life can finally continue
Because it is not a life
If I keep living it this way
Another opportunity lightens the path I am willing to take
No matter what, I have to learn from the mistakes
I have conclusively let go of what I had to say