Energy
Location
It’s 3 in the morning and I am awake.
Not because I have insomnia or I’m feeling a little sick.
I am awake because there is a pounding.
A pounding in the back of my head
endlessly throbbing through my delicate veins
and settling in the bottom of my heart where you used to be.
According to the law of conservation,
energy cannot be created nor destroyed,
only transferred into a different state.
The energy I needed to keep you there,
to wrap you in chains,
and shelter you has been depleting
and I am constantly asking myself where it has gone.
And then, I look at you
and see your restrained, darkened eyes
lurking out from the insides of my love,
craving the gentle light of the sun.
And I give it to you.
Because you do not deserve confinement.
You deserve so much more and I deserve so much less.
You with your unfathomable empathy and your uncurtailed desire for wanderlust.
And I, with my banal personality simply looking at pictures of Europe
on the cover of an unopened travel guide.
I do not deserve to hold you in my heart, but what can I do.
I am in love with a rose, but I am nothing but a dandelion.
And when I see you walk amongst the garden of opportunity
and finally pick out a flower that you yourself can cherish in the vase of your heart,
realize where my energy has been transferred to.