Rag Doll

Down the street 
Her tattered shoes 
Making a beat 
Toot toot toot 
Her simple dress 
Her baby doll smile 
I wish she could stay for a little while 
She’s in the sky 
While I’m here sighing 
She was always so happy 
But inside she was dying 
And shes still smiling 
Waiting for her rebirth 
My little rag doll Has left this earth 
Her tattered shoes 
Making a beat 
Toot toot toot 
Her simple dress 
Her baby doll smile 
I wish she could stay for a little while 
She’s in the sky 
While I’m here sighing 
She was always so happy 
But inside she was dying 
And shes still smiling 
Waiting for her rebirth 
My little rag doll Has left this earth 

Comments

Monsterxx4

Inspired by a song. :)

jwiener

Rhythm and repetition make this poem very strong- I really liked the "toot toot toot" line, because I could actually hear the sound in my head, and it made the writing very powerful.

Monsterxx4

Thank you so much for this feedback. Im actually not used to getting feedback so I'm really excited about this and I'm glad you like it.

jwiener

You are very welcome. You are an amazing poet. Keep writing!

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