sorry

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Soon sixteen and life has not been a dream. I am told life is not supposed to be hard, yet it is for the little girl.  
Nous ne savons pas Quand nous disons adieu Parce que demain N'appartient qu'à Dieu Nous ne savons pas
I am a terrible texter A shitty snap-chatter A flop on Facebook And all around awful at any form of virtual communication I blame it on my depression sometimes
Why is it that it is so easy to forgive other people, but we I have such a hard time forgiving me? That I give myself one chance to get something right, but I give others two chances; sometimes I even give them three.
I feel so tired tonight, I know I promised to be back, But sorry for not coming back. 
People come and go, But u stayed.... People leave u broken, But u mended.... People hurt ur soul, But u loved.... People dont care, But u cared.... People break ur trust,
Heeeeeeeey there....bud. Listen, I'm bad at this. Remember that time I was weird and it made you uncomfortable? I was probably trying to be funny, clearly it was a swing and a miss.
I love you so very much,Even though at times I do things that hurt.I try so hard to hope that you always seeHow much you being in my life means to me.I am sorry yet again for causing you pain.
I'm so tired of being the one that has to be okay all the time I'm so over being the one that always has to take a deep breath and trek on I'm tired of wearing a mask for everyone else while I die on the inside
I am sorry for what I did, I know you're getting sick of me I'm getting sick of myself I don't know how many times  I can say sorry to you, The truth is I miss you.
I’m sorry.   I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry it felt like a one-time thing. I’m sorry I didn’t see you sooner, the you I wished I’d seen all along. I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner
I have an apology to make An apology to myself I'm sorry for hurting you When I picked up that pencil last night and raked it across my arm
I am crawling and falling and calling I need you to hear me, come near me, don’t fear me while you flee, watch me bleed, please don’t leave cause I’m flying and I’m crying, but I’m dying
Life is what you make it We live on borrowed time But if life is what we make it Then it’s time that I make mine   Hide your sorrow in your pocket To prepare for rainy days
My mind is a battlefield It has trouble distinguishing danger from safety It makes rain on a tin roof sound like gun fire Makes fireworks on the Fourth of July into an air raid
I’m sorry that I couldn’t make you happy I’m sorry that I can’t make myself happy I’m sorry that happiness isn’t a language I speak But I loved you I’m sorry if I pushed you away
I wish I could tell you I have something to say But when I finally try to You walk far away   The somethings a secret That only I know I tried hard to keep it But it’s starting to show
When Simone biles runs to the bar to do back flips in the air she is an athlete.But when I run to the bar and do a backflip holding a beer, suddenly I have an alcohol problem and need help. Perhaps they might be right ya know?
Acting out emotions may delve into extremities Throwing knifes of truth And bullets shredding thin   Ricochet Ricochet Ricochet  
Firm hands, from shadows on the wall. Firm no’s, from girls around nightfall. I promised to protect you all.    Don’t touch, These artifacts are rare. Don’t look, It’s really rude to stare,
Just a reconnection. Please, it is all I ask. Just one spark could set ablaze our past. We could be something again. But this time, we’ll last.
there is another thing that I cant unseemy brother smilewhen he used to see me he used to smilebut now its clouds I hurt him so muchI cant even begin to describe what he could feel
I won't say I'm in love. I like your hair, I won't say I'm in love. I like how you don't want to catch my eyes, I won't say I'm in love.
We were young and I was so high and I’m so sorry. I was always so high. I am always so sorry.
They tell meDon't look backKeep your head highThings will get better They tell me, they tell meYou are a strong oneThe past is in the pastThings will get better
I'm always delayed, Heard, most common word to say. Only leaves you betrayed, In the end.   Sorry.   Selfishly regaining your trust, Only once and that's enough,
I told myself I wasn't gonna to do it again. I'd done it what seems like a thousand times. It was some fucked up shit. But this wasn't gonna  happen again. I was wrong so now I'm in the hot seat.
“Don’t talk to me in that tone!” Yes, mother, I apologize for my insolent self.  
Speaking is my burden Speaking is my sinNo matter if i wish to helpMy words shall never winMaybe if i speak one lessAnd choose not to say a speechThen maybe they’ll rejoiceAnd happiness they’ll preach
I'm not going to write about you anymore I can't they're all sick of you and it's all my fault when I talk about you I want to scream that they're not listening they don't pay attention anymore
 They say sorry.     They say sorry... They say sorry                Sorry                 SORRY!They always say they are so sorry. Even when it's not there fault.  Even if they don't mean it. 
You are cryptic A knot I cannot untie I'm sorry if I hurt you I wouldn't quite know Since you keep it so Guarded from me As if I hurt you But I'm not sure how I'm sorry I'm sorry
Oh, dear Sis, I’m so sorry! I really thought, I really thought he just did it to me… or that it was just a bad dream like Mommy said.   ...and I asked about the screams,
Dear You, I'm Sorry.  Based on A True Story.    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear you,
All the times I shouldn't have said sorry:1 year old: I apologize for being a mistake you made. I must get used to anger that never dissipates. 
To whom it may concern: i.e. parents, teachers, friends, and family Yes, here I am again Pockmarked with the tears of self pity And I love the scars on my face I embrace them
Dear The One Who Hates,   I still remember the days that we shared. The plucking of flowers and pulling of hair. The theories of God that would fly through our heads
Oh how I’ve messed up The trouble I have caused The hurt I have caused
"Tell me what's wrong?" "You've been distinct for so long." "I'm only here to help." "Let me know what's on your mind." "Please do tell." "Please let me know." "Come on, let me do something."
I'm sorry for everytime I called you a name I made you upset, I gave you the blame Yet you continued to smile when I hit you on the head When I said you'd wind up dead I wish I could take it all back
I would do anything for you I'd fight a dragon  or go on some magical quest Because I love you.   I would turn up at your door,  For nothing more Than to hold your hair when you are sick
I'm sorry.   I'm sorry for the lies, the things I've done, and constantly reminding you how little I care.  
With tears in my eyes I look into yours Our eternal lives Have been suddenly cut short Though they are closed tight A new door unlatched.  
Sometimes you fall in love with someone at the wrong time. Sometimes you see that pair of brown eyes for the last time and you’ll fall. Deeper, And deeper. And you always have that little bit of hope
"I'm sorry if I was sharp with you: but it's just because you descovered something broken." I'm sorry if I ever yelled at you." but it was just to cover that I'd flinched as you'd spoken."
Rolled flat, and put into a cookie cutter but I didn't come out the right shape pushed into a corner and melted into the wall Squeezed out of a frosting tip, 
I’m sorry that I apologize constantly. Ironic, right? It drives my friends crazy I ruin our fun with my apologies My conscience tells me:
You fell for the thought, The theory of me, But clearly In practice I’m not What I seem. ~Sorry not sorry~  
Dear Mom, I woke up today screaming and then realized it was just a nightmare. I don’t know why you didn’t come to check on me but I know I will be okay.   Dear Mom,
I don't care if you are depressed. I will try to cheer you up. I don't care if you are mad. I will try to make you laugh. I don't care if you are ignoring me.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I've caused you any sadness these past couple days. I'm sorry if I creeped you out. I'm sorry if I disgusted you with the idea of my love. I'm sorry if I put a bullet through your heart.
The pain is almost unbearable. I never excpected to love you, it just happened. And now here I am wishing you'd just speak to me. You flirt with everyone, but the one boy that flirts back is shunned.
Some people's idea of happiness consist of tender moments with another. Other's consist of a smokey room full of friends. Other's, of piles of money and days full of laziness.
You
Music makes me think of you. Smiles make me think of you. Poetry makes me think of you. Laughter makes me think of you. Nature makes me think of me of you.
As I remember my happy times, I long for them back. Me just a whisper of your past, but you are still screaming in my ear. I still laugh at our walks together, our childish conversations.
You call this a crush? I feel like shit everyday you avoid me. I feel like I deserve to die because what I've done. God has cursed me and left me to wilt in this ditch.
In an ocean of darkness, there is one light for me. And it shines brighter than even the sun above. It is so close, yet not within reach. I try to get closer, but the light fades into the distance.
God I hurt so much. Without you to talk to. Im trying so hard to fix it, but god I'm tired. Just tired. Emotionally, physically, psychologically. Is it even worth it at this point?
Roller coasters used to be fun. With it's ups and downs and twists and loops. I had you by my side to make it fun. Now my highs are scary, because I can only go down from them.
You were my world. You were the sun of my solar system. The music of my life. You mattered to me more than anything. And you still do.   Did you ever think about me? Did you ever dream about us?
Was it a dream? Us? We were so happy. So childlike. So carefree. What happened? It was too short. I messed it up, didn't I? My happiest days were with you.
Do you think this is what I wanted? Do you think I follow you so I can torment you? Do you think I'm happy? Do you think I am mad at you? Do you think I hate you?   I would never be mad at you.
Why do I love you? I love you because you make gremlin faces at me. I love you because your teeth don't quite line up. I love you because you bounce all over the place.
Every time I think of our time as friends, I die inside. I feel as though I just swallowed broken glass. I want to curl up in a ball and cry forever. Everytime I see you I think of my mistakes.
I live day by day now. Time seems to be but a memory anymore. Somedays I feel like time has stopped, while others fly by. I smile and laugh everyday, acting like I'm ok. On the inside, I feel like shit.
Why
I don't waste my time every morning because I think it's funny. I don't make new friends in my own interest. I don't stay at school to practice for 14 straight hours because it's fun.
New
This feeling is brand new, and I'm not sure if I like it. It's intensity burns brighter than anything I have ever known. It gives me hope and motivation. It also makes me feel hopeless and demotivates me.
War
Everyday I fight a war. I get up without the guarantee of seeing you. I go to school without you to make it bearable. I smile without you to make it real. I laugh without you to make it full.
Me
What do you see when you see me? A good friend that fucked up? A horrible friend that never truly cared? A stranger that needs to give up? A jerk that is too clingy? A loser that you wanted to humor?
Love is NOT wanting to share a night with someone, but wanting to share life with them. Love is NOT wishing the other would kiss you because you thirst for it, but kissing because the words 'I love you' are not enough.
I never expected to love you. I never thought I would even become friends. Ask me 2 years ago, I may have even called you ugly, With your short stature and uneven teeth. But oh how things have changed.
I used to be sad, used to mope and grief. I used to stand on the edge of tears as I saw you. Now I realise, there is nothing appealing about depression. Then I saw your sadness.   You became glue for me.
Sometimes I wonder, what do you dream about? Do you dream about wild fantasies where you are a queen? Do you dream about worlds made of sweets? Do you ever dream of me?  
Today, you were with me. You laughed when I laughed, we thought alike so often. Yet you seemed different, sad about, something. I wanted to ask you, but we're still being repaired.
Every smile without you is an empty one. Every laugh without you isn't worth it. Every step without you is heavy. Every breath without you hurts. Every day without you is wasted.
One, two, three let me lay in bed and count. four, five, six the mistakes I've made with you. seven, eight, nine I would take them all back. ten, eleven, twelve each one just as bad as the last.
Sorry for existing  I want to say  but I know you won't understand  you'll try to fix me with your words "don't say that, you are worth everything"  the only kind of worth I have stings when I try to wear it
Do you understand?   Do you really understand the moment, the exact instant when you realize what the beauty of the day comes to bring you?  
Can they see the sin embedded in the depths of my skin? Are they able to hear my repentance crying out like a firstborn without stretched wanting hands?
You are my best guide As you always guided me to be good son You are my inspiration As you always inspired me to dream You are my best teacher As you taught me the lessons of life
I never really understood this,  You were my "person" , meaning that i'm in love you with you, wantint you You are in love with another person, wanting them  My heart used to skip a few beats because of you
she will indeed -but she has not yet- be all you need -for you’ve not met- in times of crisis -she wasn’t here- she’s the nicest -don’t blame her dear- she sticks around
It's only 5 letters but feels more like a mouthful. You've bit off more than you can chew now you're choking on it. You can't swallow your pride so you spit it out.
You should be sorry. Sorry for cheating. Sorry for being a bad friend. Sorry for being bitter. Sorry for lying. But not sorry for existing. I'm already sorry for that.
You knew who you were dancing with the entitre time, you were prewarned.         You knew i was fucked up, incapable of perfection, incapable of love.                  You knew eventualy i would hurt you.
I hope you read this, I hope you think of me as much as I think of you, I hope you're happy, And that your dreams have come true, I hope you read this, I hope you some day forgive me,
I remember you well;Your hazel eyes and all.They burned with a rich fire,I'm dying to recall. You used to hold me tight,In your arms safe and sure.You'd caress my wild hair,Then a kiss would occur.
I'm sorry I took your time for granted I was shy but very romantic and I wish you'd understand that I loved you even more than I did myself, too  
Confessions     I wonder if you knew how I needed you… I won’t tell you so, you know how my pride do.
I still think about you every day I see you in the halls your hair is a fiery red now perhaps you've moved on and are flaunting your tenacity you wore converse today so did i
I know you have said it all before I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it The fight we had last night, you called me ugly I’m sorry, you’re beautiful
She said she's sorry that she made him ashamed To be vulnerable and open Since she's been living that way It was imparted on she, so to him she did the same She never knew that the girl that she wanted to be
"Your smile fades  As you look away I see the broken pain That is causing me shame Why couldn't I see What was pointed out so clearly I went looking for trouble  But it was right in front of me
your smile slowly disappears and your eyes lose their life cuts and scars appear so tempting was that knife you were as bright as the sun
It must feel great that your life has a soundtrack Forget responsibilities, you'd rather sit back Relax, just be a character not claiming any agency How are you your own side role? Wake up, you ain't no baby
Amongst the quiet young night, Surrounded by darkened green And pale yellow glowing all around, A woman sat alone on a bench With no direction to head to And thoughts that cannot be contained.
Now that the darkness is gone You're coming back to me You kept me in prison But now you're setting me free
April 12, 2013 I had blue frosting on my lips, face covered in lies. You walked in and placed your keys in your coat pocket, "You lied, we can't be friends, Happy Birthday Erica" you said tears in your eyes and I said my goodbyes..
"I am sorry" was what he kept repeating. 
These hands you'l never hold Whenever it feels cold These hands you'll never hold Until it gets so old
I'm not the blushing bride, Or the homecoming queen. I'm not the girl you take home to see your mother, or the woman who's given respect on sight.   I'm a fighter. I punch,              Kick,
I am sorry
im so sorry for trying  im so sorry for feeling this way 
I’m so sorry that I can’t be Everything that you want from me I’m sorry that I’m left trying to say No, in the very kindest way I get so confused, and I don’t understand
I can't say I'm flawless Because I have flaws I'm human I always will be I make mistakes But when I hurt, I say sorry I'll forever be a friend And stick till the end of time
When I hear the word flawless,  I think of precious gems like diamonds.  The thing about a diamond is that Its flawlessness isn't about brilliance or perfection;  Unpolished diamonds look like every other rock. 
Forget thi
in my mind
I sit here wondering Why i have caused you so much  PAIN... You walk away   I try to get to your heart  But you shut it down   Today i sit here wondering what i have done wrong,
You say you’ll always be there Listen to me As if you really care So many things flow through my head
I remember your face on which there was pain and disbelief distorting your features beyond recognition when I saw you for the last time. Forgive me For I caused your eyes
She’s going to kill herself Maybe not today or tomorrow, But someday she will, Before you cry “get a hotline”, Know that we tried. We tried so much, But her heart has already died.
Stop Being sorry Sorry that I feel so dead inside, Sorry my smile isn’t perfect. Sorry I have a tendency to cry, Sorry I'm everything you're not.
Why do people feel the need To say they’re sorry for everything? I’m sorry you’re sad. I’m sorry you’re happy. I’m sorry you’re hurt. I’m sorry you’re sorry. Sorry has become just a word
You killed my confidence and left me crawling— Not that I was old enough to know before That it’s okay to love myself and someone else At the same time with nothing to be sorry for.  
all i ever am is sorry. the words float around my skull day and night, "I'm sorry." sorry when the back seats are squished because I'm taking up room sorry when I'm talking too loud, too much
I always thought nothing could ever hurt me,  I always thought I was unstoppable. Until the day came.. When I lost my bestfriend..   I never thought death could heart..
sorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorry An endless litany Buzzing through my head
I have no inspiration, I don't have anything to write about. Maybe it will come to me as I'm writing. Maybe it wont.
Couldn't see, couldn't hear, darkness was everywhere Why did you leave? I needed you More now than ever I'm so lost without the two of you Remember when you would call me boo?
Don't think you can ignore me Walk out of the door and out of my life I looked up to you and thought of you twice To me you were everything, the reason I lived and breathed
I apologize, sincerely, for all that I am I am sorry for being so rude, and never taking a stand
Sorry, my sister I meant no harm I didn’t know you’d be alarmed   Sorry, my sister I don’t want you to hate me I just wanted you to let me be   Sorry, my sister
I'm Sorry, No, not me, you are, Well, sometimes,
Friends, there for you through good times and bad Sometimes they are the family you ever had. Friends come and go like the wind, Some help you in the midst of your sin.  
It is with a heavy heart that I am writing this to you. I want to start off by saying I'm sorry, I'm sorry for allowing misconceptions to seep into your mind, Destroying your future.
Who are you? You help make me, you birthed me , but who are you?
Run
You keep the past in your back pocket Just close enough, where you might catch it You scrape your knee on the pavement  You look down and you hate it  But I think that the blood might just sober you up   
Behavior is a result of environment and time. I was not born apologizing every time I spoke up. I was a little girl who ran into life like there was no time to worry,
I don't want to be listen too and ignored like the dirt pavement in the forest.I wish not to be called down because of my ever changing emotions as I struggle through life.
Make Me ForgetKiss me so that I forget what his lips taste likeTouch me so I no longer feel him
I need to take some time out of my schedule just to acknowledge some people to say sorry Now taking time out of my day to say sorry got to be major because that mean I got a lot of apologizing to do
Maybe it’s time for me to step back, Forget get the good times, let go of the past. I don’t think I’m welcomed anymore, I think it’s time to walk out the door.   I’m sorry I had to hurt you all this way,
Goodnight my loves Goodnight for long To God I hope I'll see you all To God I'll pray "let me see another day" To God I hope that the sun will rise and the moon shall fall And I will be there to experience it all
I never knew what love was like That was until I met you How could I forget? Your smile, your eyes the way you fret It made me feel like I was invincible. All that changed one day.
Everyday Same time Your front door creaks, did you notice? Mine does, too. 10:30 AM, you walk out of your apartment- The one right across the hall from mine- And I make sure I walk out, too.
 It’s not that I don’t like the light, It’s that I prefer the dark.
All these haters observin’ me. Colliding their trash, an attempt to murder me. But these niggas haven’t even heard of me. Ill kill you off verbally. Destroy your life emotionally. Disturb your soul mentally.
It was all predetermined By the actions I made from the start Doing things I had no bussiness doing And now it's come to haunt me Slowly ruining my life And the realization sinks in
At time like this, I clench my teeth so that the tears don't fall. When I hear the words that come out of your mouth, I feel useless, incompetent... Like a dead weight. Sometimes I wish I hadn't been born.
I should probably tell you I’m in pain
I'm sorry that I couldn't stitch the broken Inches of love On the surface of Your skin.   I'm sorry that I Tried to pick you up When you wanted To stay on the ground.  
It was your wish come true A gift from me to you The poisoned arrow flies Falling down it petrifies   One minute can't delay What mine lips must shall say It never was my wish
They call me the "Ice Queen" for a reason. I honestly don't know what happened. Even when I was kid, young, naive, and believing in everything, I didn't believe in myself
Never thanked you for making things possible Never apologized for that day I made you cry Never understood what you were trying to say I was truly blind This isn't crap This is real
Two days ago I woke up with a sign on my door that read "Sorry We Missed You"  I was with my friends late last night so I didn't even think about answering the door My daddy always told me "Baby girl live it up while you can"
Cry
Cry. Cry until your head hurts. Cry until no more tears come out. Cry until your heart can’t take it anymore. Cry for release. Cry for your soul. Cry it all out. Cry for pleasure.
Oma
She was beautiful once. She was feisty once. She could ride a Harley, choke a stogie and found herself as a fine woman of the 50’s.
This I must confess That I wonder when you will wake up and realize What I truly am. Because for all my fanciful thoughts and fairytales I must confess that I will
No time to think, or act at that matter. Hands full a tray falling to the ground             out
My heart will always want you In my world its only you My mind is mixed and you know it In my thoughts you are always in it   Youre the reason for it all And to be with you again Id have to give it all
Da
When my Great Grandmother was near death in the hospital I was curious to see what an old person's butt looks like, so I kept standing on my tippie toes to catch a see
Thoughts of her Dripping into my sternum From all the way up there In my brain Where she has implanted herself   Like an alien egg    
I hate you dad It’s not personal though
hey daddy, it's me, you're little girl... I need to tell you something that will make you want to curl. I went to that party, it was right down the block, but I didn't bother telling you, I was distraught.
Please… Just look my way. For a second, A moment, A wrinkle in time. I wish you would
Should I be sad or feel sorry  For the lonely house wife whose husband is six feet under Even though it wasn't my fault I didn't give him the pain or neediness
I hid behind pretty words and fake smiles, while behind them i was always lost and confused, you made me feel so safe at your side like i belonged there.. yet so horribly vulnerable i wanted to disapear, so i ran...
The pain i put you through, after everything we would do. This time it's to late, I can't take it back, it's a fool I am. So go on be gone, depart from me. Can't you see we're no longer meant to be.
Is it truly never enough for such a word to be understated? to question its power and under rate it? to be sorry is it not enough?
Writing is an escape From the things I can't control. Because my other method to cope Truly gives no control at all. My life is wild and crazy And the blades just make it hazy.
We were friends We knew each other well But there are things I didn't know I didn't know them until it was too late You were hurting I didn't know You were lost I didn't know
These hands delve into the ground to remake what I once found When I was better and my conscience was light as a feather I made this as empty as I feel, but now I'm not alone I am a weight eroding those
lots of things can end in silence a fight is fought with words like knives cutting the one you love and there are too many i'm sorries to be had so it ends in silence
Had a sporadic moment of brilliance today This extra-terrestrial brown skin Bronzed with historical significance Scarred with repetitive adversity It isn’t coming off
Capture the past I'll let it live Very loud, asking for forgiveness Ignite a passion for history Let you beat me like I beat you
Who I am It’s hard to describe But something lies in between both eyes A vision to be greater More than me Bigger than the bigger picture More than free Who I am I may never decide
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