That feeling is such a wonderful thing, as you cross go.
You believe anything they say,
even lies, lies, and more lies. Love paints this definition
of perfection. They do no wrong
in your eyes. You will allow them your tender heart to break.
For this love, it is so deep you
cannot let go, and will take either their indifference
or fake words. Anything, for this
true love. You can ignore that they perceive you as a game.
And time by time, you are played,
deftly as a bow. But with time comes contempt. Separate
souls twist and mix, become the same.
Can you truly not see how it all turned out this way?
You cannot even recognize
your eyes in the mirror. Yet, your devout love, though buried,
has not swayed, in the face of
the humiliation or the pain. You never ask if
you would find greener grass for what
you pay. It is because of the thought floating just in reach,
‘we are one and the same inside.’
The perfect other half, all forgiveness and gentle words,
that refuses to leave. With time,
things change but stay the same for you. That in which you valued
is no more. You have become like
your beloved, just as scorned. For, you can no longer
distinguish between the love you
started with and the hatred you are bearing. Any words
that unbalance this—this tiny
paltry fizz of feeling, you refuse to let go. Even
as heartbreaking words gain volume
inside your heart, almost like an overflowing teacup.
The years have continued between
you two, with all the bitter and salty unspoken words
not shared. With closed windows,
you let in nothing new. You cry inside, silent, and cling
to memories you create to
stay strong. Case in point, back through the years past, love that was not
meant to be is held tight in your
hands, for better or worse. You never forget your first love.