You Might Say It’s Self Destructive But You See It’s More Productive Than If I Were To Be Happy

I really want a change in my life

and I want to do something

stupid and drastic

like packing up everything

taking all the money I can

and traveling across oceans

or perhaps

I’ll fling myself into someone’s arms

and I’ll claim it to be love

regardless of

whether or not

I’ll know otherwise

a girl asked me on a date the other day

and I said yes

but she asked with the condition

that we’ll do it when it’s hot and sunny out

and it’s Minnesota so that’s eternities away

she asked me to go to a bar with her

which leads to another thing

I could take up drinking

and be among the presence

of all the other blackout artists

but at the end of the day

I am rooted to things

that keep me from being


self destructive

so I just want to sleep until things are drastically different



Beautiful poetry. Sometimes I'd get this buzzing in my head, sort of like I'm missing out on something important. Like I could be doing something else, be somewhere else, with someone else, that would change me, teach me, develop my talents and skills. Backpacking across Europe without the intent of arriving at any certain destination, is what I'd like to be doing. But like you said, there is always something in the present moment holding me back. I'll look back to these days and laugh to myself as I climb the mountains of Finland and explore the depths of Prague. 

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