You Can't Just Say It to Your Teacher

I see the way you stare at me,

I hear what you think of me,

I feel the burn of your hatred for me,

I smell your disdain,

I taste the words of anger falling from your lips like flames.

 

All my senses scream out,

“STOP”

Don’t do this to yourself,

But I still go into his classroom,

I still watch him teach,

I pretend to listen.

 

He yells at me,

And gives me a detention,

It starts all over again,

It may be a new year,

But it’s not a new beginning for me,

I’m trapped in this endless cycle.

 

I go in after school,

Knowing what’s coming for me.

You lock the door,

And turn off the front lights.

You leave the back ones on so

You can see the wounds you leave on

me.

 

You don’t see the ones in my mind.

 

I see where our bodies join and I hate it,

I hear the sound of your harsh breathing,

I feel your body against mine, burning me,

I smell the sweat and sex coming from us,

I taste the blood in my mouth, from biting my

tongue.

 

I imagine myself somewhere else,

with someone I love,

on a hillside maybe.

Having a picnic.

I want to scream

“MONSTER”

But I don’t say anything.

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