Words I Meant to Say

Sun, 08/24/2014 - 19:35 -- cliu002

I thought I was prepared for whatever you had to say,

But I guess I was wrong.

The words that you said that day caught me off guard to tell you the truth.

I didn’t know how to respond except nod my head in agreement to another person’s response, “Good for you.”

 

I mean why wouldn't it be?

You just came out and told your best friends that you are who you are and you're not afraid of letting us know because you know that we will still be your friends until the very end.

 

But why did it bother me so much?

I don’t know.

Was I afraid of losing you as a friend?

Or did I just think that you would become a whole new person?

I just kept asking myself questions but I had no answers to them.

 

It bothered me so much that I started to zone out during work.

I didn't realize it but that’s when I took a trip down memory lane.

I went through all of the pictures on my phone of our entire high school year.

I was so overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts that I just didn’t know what to do anymore.

I just sat there staring out of the window.

 

It wasn't until a customer said she disagreed with her fortune,

“You make friends by exchanging deeds not accepting them.”

But her response was “No, you make friends by accepting them for who they are.”

 

That’s when I realized that I could easily answer my own questions.

I was afraid of losing you as a friend.

I did think that you would become a whole new person.

Everything that I thought were all my own fears of losing a friend like you. 

 

I realized that I shouldn’t be afraid.

I should be proud, proud of you.

You had the confidence to tell others your own secret.

You weren’t afraid of being who you are,

And I should have given you my response earlier.

 

Words do not change who you are.

It does not change our friendship and the memories that we had together.

It doesn’t change the fact that you still care for us and love us for who we are.

I should have known that from the beginning,

but it took awhile for me to realize.

 

If you’re still waiting for my response then, I would have to say 

 

“I now know someone gay and I am proud of calling him my best friend.”

 

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