I struggle to find an answer-

the words I want to say

sit on the tip of my tongue

like sodden flower petals

You want to know why

I am

Me

What can I say

when you already have your mind made up about me?

What can I say when you think

my sadness

is self caused

and self induced

How can I tell you

that I’m sick

How can I tell you that my cure is not to be found

in the pages of a book

How can I tell you

That my heart is a ghost town

filled with the memories of

singing bones

smiling flowers

and a summer that never ended

Summer lived in my heart once-

before the sickness in me

ate it away

the demons of sadness

were cruel-

leaving me a ghost of a girl

living in a ghost town

I cannot find the words -

My mouth is full of the dead flowers from summer

(the ones I tried to save from the demons of sadness)-

"Why do you do this to yourself?

You bring it on yourself

Find The Cure

God

Knows you Know Where To Look-“

I just smile,

letting the crushed petals fall from my mouth-

                                                          (In sweet half truths)

Because I do not own the right words

to tell you

how

my heart became a ghost town-

 

My sadness

Killed the summer of my heart.