What They Saw
Day after day, I wracked my brain,
Searching for some talent,
Something I was destined to do,
Like a dog trying to find a bone but there were none.
I failed.
I was the one in the group to be
Talentless. Worthless. Useless.
Nothing I did mattered, not like them.
The artist, the actress, the damn musician.
They knew their talents, their excellence, their skilled expertise.
I was the scared little girl holding a stuffed teddy bear
lost in the crowded streets of New York,
Like the statue of liberty,
The empire state building
They towered over me,
I was a nobody
Not even a threat.
I paled in comparison when it came to what they were capable of,
I was desperate to find my passion
My label
Me
On several occasions, I’d look around this big world we live in,
I’m a damn umbrella with holes just waiting to get thrown out.
I wallowed in self pity.
Like a wave of emotions overcoming me, drowning me,
My lungs were collapsing
I knew I was a goner.
Then there they were.
The creator on canvas, the master of disguise, the instrument wielder.
They were my best friends, they ARE my best friends.
I was the butterfly unable to see the beauty in its own wings
And envied the others
when finally,
I manifested in words of the people I loved.
What they saw was something I was physically and mentally unable to see,
What they saw was a person that was composed of compassion
I was the glue of the group,
The optimist,
The person that was so happy, I got annoying.
I realized,
I am not useless.
I have self worth.
I am here for a damn reason.
I will be the light of the ones being consumed in darkness and depression
To break the walls built so sturdy around one's heart and soul
To turn someone's brutality and cruelty to love and care
To make their pessimistic view to an optimistic one
Never half empty, always half full