its hard to tell you how i feel when im fighting this depression. most of times when i tell you, you start asking questions. sometimes its best for you just to comfort me. i’m not asking you to do much, but at least respect what im going through and don’t bother me— about what i need to do and how my day should be. i know i need to fight this and everybody needs God. don’t start judging me, mr. expert about how to live my life because you don’t know what go through in my mind, or the temptations that i fight at night, or the demons in my dreams that try to take me out. all this pain in my heart, everyday i ask the lord to take me out. don’t tell me you love me, when i know you don’t because when i depend on you for love, you know where to be found. all this ache in my heart, i feel like i could be a killer now. i don’t wanna push myself that far, so isolate myself from things that i need to be distant from now. listen to some music, but not what you thinking. listening to my mama and her christian preaching— some things can’t be arranged over time, but i know one day i’ll be free from my mind. take control of my emotions and for that i thank God. being free from that pain in my body, felt like the healing of all time.