What I see

You see, through my words,

I wasn't born into this world a pauper.

I wasn't raised by monks, but by priests.

They taught me everything but one thing

How the world is.

Idealistically, materialistically, fanatically, quite frankly,

The world is nothing like how I expected.

I came to Freshman year

That first day I cried,

Upset,

Fret,

Wet,

Threat,

Cigarette.

My eyes lay witness to disquieting violence,

Unbelievable transgression! Shouting! Fists! Hate!

I cannot explain how the wars fought between fifteen-year-olds was so disheartening.

I was scared for my life.

Thought to carry a knife,

As if some blade could save me! Hah!

Nothing would be there but my faith

To hug me, to compensate for the day.

And so my tears fell.

And so my cheeks were wet

With clear blood.

The ominous shower of apathy and transgression poured everyday for three months.

For three months I feared my life.

I was fierce, I was bold,

But no matter how hard I endeavored to keep swimming,

Constantly, the water above madly brimming,

The violent claws of my peers held me under.

Just a short breath, I hoped, but t'was a blunder.

I took in water, like a fish

I had but one final wish...

The waves, they crashed

I could see the surface!

It was so close, and I was getting closer!

Day by day!

I held my breath.

I held my breath for three months.

And for three months I choked on that blunder.

But I reached the surface, I coughed up the water.

I basked in the warm sun as the swells beneath me rippled out of sight.

I said no to the drugs and the cigarettes

But, that's only me.

They shouldn't have been offered in the first place

So as I may drift above the current

The current is made of a million souls

Half-children desiring to be whole

Stripped by strip they are lost to the current

Of transgression, of drugs, of incompleteness.

The priests told me to never lose that breath,

Never lose it to a foul word,

Never surrender to a puff from a cigarette,

Never give in to the black waters that will try to envelop you.

What I have seen, defines me.

 

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