Life is a giant courting ritual, an act to find your “pairing”

Where outside appearances flourish, and the inside is left behind

But then what?

You look, sound and smell your best in hopes that someone, just anyone will pick you

For at least long enough to not feel so alone

Is that not how the game goes, with no regards to feelings? Right!

In this game there are no feeling, at least not at first, not in the beginning, never on purpose

It is a great big superficial dance that I do not want to be a part of

I don’t want to be gamed, or smooth talked, I don’t need your obsessive compliments

Or your sad attempts to get me to go somewhere with you.

Because we both know this isn’t real, I want real, real is what I do need.

But then what?

The chances of meeting someone who enhances and understands you in the same

Productive way that you do them is so slim

To feel and truly be peacefully at one with another soul

To see yourself so you are able to be yourself, this is real, this is perfect

 the perfect relationship that works seamlessly, effortlessly, truthfully

That grows and changes together, and helps one another through all the imperfections of the world.

But today everyone wants to play around, thinking of now and forgetting forever

So I will be over here, working on myself, by myself.

Forced to deal with fears of unrealistic expectations

I’ll sit and wait and see what happens

 

...But then what?