Toxic

Am I toxic?

She tells me I’m toxic

No

She tells me I lie

No

She tells me I’m selfish and hurt people around me

No, no, no, no, no

She tells me that I cannot hide

Help

She tells me and it destroys my inside

Help

She tells me that I cannot run

But if I cannot run then how do I fly?

Help

But what if I lie?

Wait

What if I’m selfish

Hold on

What if I hurt people more than I hurt inside

Stop

I cannot run, I cannot hide, I cannot fly

Flying was a dream

A dream that came to me

A dream she crushed inside her palm

We said things we did not mean

I am not a bad person

She is not a bad friend

We just didn’t mix well and that is the story I’ll tell myself

I’ll just get a new friend

But what if this friend thinks the same things?

Oh no

What if she thinks I’m mean

Oh god

What if she makes me question everything

Wait

This story sounds too familiar

A woman I had in my past

She’d cry and laugh and call me a brat

She told me I lie

No

She told me I’m selfish

No

She told me I could not run, I could not hide, I cannot fly

Flying was a dream

A dream that came to me

A dream that was crushed by so many

A dream that was crushed by me.

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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