Some nights I struggle to sleep. My mind starts sprinting into fields of hysteria because what if I wake up and this was all a dream? Although you are my dream come true, I don’t want you to be the dream that never came true. So I play checkers with insomnia instead. 

Some nights I cry silent tears. I’m overwhelmed with so many happy moments that I wasn’t allowed to acknowledge or bruised by the unintentional blows my ego has taken and I fear I might explode. So I allow the wells of my eyes to scrapbook for me instead. 

Some nights I dream of forevers with you. I realize I’m impulsive and compulsive but when I see you smiling at me, my heart speeds up. When you kiss me, the intensity my brain jumps into overload, so I breathe, slow down„ and just try to focus on our tomorrow.

Some nights I wonder what good deed did I do to receive a reward like you. What did I do to deserve a blessing so unbelievable that I’ve been tempted to call Ripley’s? I haven’t figured it out so I spend my time thanking God instead.

There will always be doubt. There will always be mountains and obstacles to climb. But focusing on all the great times and the little things you do … gives me more time to Love instead.