Societies 7 rules for Being Black.

Here are societies 7 rules for being black. If you don’t follow them well then you’re not black:

1- ALWAYS listen to rap music. And no I don’t mean Eminem, Macklemore, or Justin Bieber’s fail attempt at rapping with his song “Boyfriend”. No that stuff makes you white sorry to break it to you. I’m talking about the real new school rap, you know the type that refers to women as “bitches” and “hoes”, where they talk about “getting money”, and where they constantly use the “N” word.

2- Now that we’re on the topic of the N word, ALWAYS refer to your friends, peers, enemies, basically any male in your life as the “N” word. Without this you mine as well just bleach your skin white because if you don’t use this word you’re not considered black, like at all.

3- ALWAYS wear your pants below your waist, I mean if you’re really black you HAVE to and I do mean HAVE to show your ass to the entire  world.

4- NEVER EVER speak correct English. Don’t display your 12 years of education because that’s only for white people.

5- ALWAYS surround yourself with black people because if you’re seen with any white people at all then you’re trying to be like them.

6- Don’t EVER speak kind to others. Like at all.

7- And last but certainly not least NEVER PAY YO BABY MAMMA CHILD SUPPORT!

Now if you’re when of those black people who decide not to follow these rules because:

1- you are open-minded and listen to a wide variety of music.

2- you decide to refrain from the N word because it defeats the purpose of Martin Luther King’s dream, or Rosa Park refusing to leave her seat, or any of your ancestors who’s fought to the death for the abolishment of that word.

3- you decide to wear your pants on your waist because the origins of the style comes from a place where you don’t have your own identity just a number.

4- you decide to speak correct English because you refuse to let the 12 years spent learning it go down the drain.

5- you don’t pick friends based on the color of their skin but on the content of their character.

6- you believe in the golden rule which states “treat others the way you’d like to be treated”.   

7- you pay your child support because you’re a man who believes in the safety and welfare of your child.

Then I’m sorry to break it to you man, but according to society you’re an oreo. But don’t worry because according to me you’re you’re your own person.