Remus Lupin

Fri, 05/20/2022 - 11:09 -- Mjmk

Just a twinge of pain through my head

Just a little bit

But soon it moves

Through my arms

And then through my legs

I feel the sensation

And soon the pain is so severe

I cannot help but scream

Even with my friends in the room

My friends have done everything

With my before this

And now

Now we're trying something new

I am scared

What if they are disgusted

Too disgusted to be in my presence

And will leave me to rot

In this dark old house

All alone in the world

But I have a deeper fear

Because what if it doesn't work

What if I hurt the people

I care about most

James who lead me through the darkness of the monster

Sirius who was there

Just there

He know knew

But kept it to himself

He who helped me through it

And that means more than I can explain

And Peter, who even when scared

Continued to stay

And never once backed down

So what if I do something

Lose control

Leave a scratch

Yes, that's it

What if I hurt them

Hurt them like I hurt myself on these nights

But by now

Thoughts are no longer in my mind

As they have been

It hurts too much

Too much

The pain is overwhelming

It won't stop

I can feel it stretching

Stop

Stop

I want it all to stop

To just get it over with

It hurts

But then it's done

It all goes silent

And it doesn't hurt as much

And I'm no longer myself

I'm something else

Looking through anothers eyes

I see a stag

A rat

And a dog

Who are they?

Why are they here?

Can they be trusted?

I growl my teeth

I want them to know

I'm in charge

But then the dog

Walks over and lays down

Right in front of me

And something about him

Seems familiar

And when I see him

A warm jolt

runs through my body

A shock

Something the monster isn't used to

But it's nice

So I sniff him

And I can tell

He's good

And the next morning when I wake up

I can still tell when Sirius walks in

That's he's good

And he makes me feel

Like I can be too

Even with the monster

 

 

 

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