The Red Light
The mom in the van with a worried look on her face
Just two streets to go and she’ll see her son’s face
She mentally checks things off her list at a lightning fast speed
Come on light, she says, change to green
In the next lane over, a teen sits behind the wheel thinking about the baby in the back
She glances at her girl and there's a crack in her mask
As she thinks about the light bill, the gas money, and Christmas, she spills tears
She knows her life will only get harder with the years
Yet when the baby smiles the young mother smiles too and she says to the baby, oh, how I love you
Across the intersection in an old Chevy truck sit two people holding hands
It will be okay, says the man
Yet for the first time in their sixty-five year journey,
She doubts his confidence and feels her heart yearning
For just a mile down the road is the Chemotherapy center
Her mind feels as numb as the upcoming winter
She reaches over and grabs his hand
Feeling as if she is falling through quick sand
Cancer doesn’t care if you have six children and their little ones depending on you,
Not to mention her best friend, whom faced with her absence would not know what to do
So she turns away and utters a prayer
Please God dying right now is something I can’t bear
The tinted windows of the car make it hard to see the young man fixing his tie and thinking of where he will be
He’s on the way to a job interview and rehearses his talk,
All the while trying to ignore his father’s sneering face and voice saying, it’s your fault!
Yet no matter how hard he tries to forget or how fast he runs
His drunken father is here to say you’ll turn out like me, after all, you’re my son
He closes his eyes as his father’s voice grows still
I will not be like him- I will make something of myself, I will, I will
And finally, in the midst of all these unfamiliar faces, here I sit, taking it all in.
Isn’t it funny how much one can pick up just on a whim?
I happened to think about someone other than myself for once
I learned more things than I had in months
Suddenly, the light changes, going from dark red to bright green in a flash.
Stay, don’t go, I want to ask
And for one instant nobody moves, it’s as if life itself has been put on pause
Then, at once, they remember their cause
And they’re going, going, going, gone
I feel sad watching them go, I don’t want to move on
I feel like I know them, like we were friends
I don’t want this to end
I want to kiss the woman’s cheek and tell her to keep fighting her illness
Giving up now would be the opposite of harmless
I want to say do you know how truly blessed you are
To have a man who loves you more than his whole heart
To have lived over half your life with your soul mate
The man who still resembles the little boy you met at age eight
Always be grateful for the same young man who took you to prom
And fell more in love with you all night long
Recall the same man who wed you four falls after
And always filled you with laughter
Watch each one of your children come into this Earth,
And this man, now a daddy, say this is more than what I deserve
No matter what the test screens show
One only has to look at you to know
You’re a living miracle
Everything you’ve made, all you’ve done, it’s incredible
Look at the love and family that is sensational
What you’ve been through is simply motivational
You’re an angel and can never truly die
Too many people love you to forget your extraordinary life
I want to hug the small brunette teen who is still a child herself
Even though she feels like her life is on a shelf
She fought for this baby
No one promised to help her, the daddy never even said maybe
But one day, sometime down the road,
She’ll meet the one who will lift her heavy load,
Who will look at her with love, acceptance, and compassion in his eyes
For this child now a woman really has tried
To be a good mother, the best she knows how
And to always, always, make her daughter proud
No matter how many jobs she has to take
She will never regret the consequence her choice has made
Because what she thought was the end turned out to be the beginning
And really she feels as if she is winning
She will make it through and she will smile while doing it
She could not ever leave her child or quit
She never imagined she could love someone so much
But when she held her the first time, she just barely touched
Her perfect fingers and toes
And tiny little nose
And, right before the doctor whisked her away
She whispered the three words for the first time that day
I love you
This was true
I want to pat the back of the successful youth
You aren’t him, I’d say, you’re you
Don’t live in his past, embrace your future
You’re always going to wonder why he had to be such a loser
And you’re always going to love him, no matter what you say
Because he’ll always be your dad at the end of the day
You wish he would have been around to see you grow
You would have made him proud, you know
But it’s his loss that he never got to see
The incredible man that you turned out to be
As much as you think so, you’re really not like him at all
You have so much greatness in you that he never saw
But your mother did and she worked so hard
To make you see that you don’t always need to put up your guard
Because there are people in the world that love you for you
And don’t need you to give any proof
Like your best friend, the one that you’ve come to love
She’ll take you, scarred as you are, because she sees the beauty beneath the rough
She knows how hard life has been on you
But she also knows how much you can and will do
So don’t wait too long
To make her your wife
There are just some things you have to take in life
To make yourself happy, and just to survive
Don’t shut yourself off and let your guard show
Remember how your mom said this is not your fault you know
Forget about him, and look at your mom
How she loves you so much, and constantly says you did nothing wrong
She has worked all her life to build you back up
To repair all the damage done by one man she’d say that’s life, pup
Your mama always said you’d make it through
And look at what a great job she’s done with you
So here I am to say
You’ll do a great job today
And don’t give up just because he did
Come on, man, live
I want to touch the mother’s arm and say stop worrying
You’re always flurrying
You never think you’re good enough
You’re just almost out of luck
You’re always so afraid of making everything perfect
You’ve missed out on the things that count, the imperfects
It’s okay if there are dirty dishes in the sink
Look at what you have, stop and just think
Your husband misses the funny, beautiful, blushing girl he wed
Your seven year old son won’t always want you to tuck him into bed
Stop picking him apart
Look at his heart
So similar to your old one and yet so unique
His young spirit has not even started to peak
Forgive the drunk driver who took your baby girl
Your baby girl with her blonde curls
The thief who took her stole your happiness as well and made you this way
Because of the life-changing act that happened that day
I know her sweet spirit will forever haunt you
But think about the people who are still alive with you
Go back to them, before it’s too late
Before it’s them you start to hate
Remember what you used to say
Life isn’t about the perfect things, it’s the imperfects that make the day
Move on, they need you
They miss you
Yet I don’t say any of this as I watch them go
I feel as if I should let them know
That I hope they take my advice
Because I want them to be alright
They turn in all different directions and I know I’ll never see them again
This seems almost like a sin
I guess I’ll never really know if what I thought about them was true
But see how much you realize when you think of someone other than you
I saw other people’s need for understanding
And I wished I could stay close at hand
Maybe I everything I thought about them was wrong
It was like singing the words to an unfamiliar song
But as I sat there under that red light
I thought again maybe I was right
It will be okay, says the man
Yet for the first time in their sixty-five year journey,
She doubts his confidence and feels her heart yearning
For just a mile down the road is the Chemotherapy center
Her mind feels as numb as the upcoming winter
She reaches over and grabs his hand
Feeling as if she is falling through quick sand
Cancer doesn’t care if you have six children and their little ones depending on you,
Not to mention her best friend, whom faced with her absence would not know what to do
So she turns away and utters a prayer
Please God dying right now is something I can’t bear
The tinted windows of the car make it hard to see the young man fixing his tie and thinking of where he will be
He’s on the way to a job interview and rehearses his talk,
All the while trying to ignore his father’s sneering face and voice saying, it’s your fault!
Yet no matter how hard he tries to forget or how fast he runs
His drunken father is here to say you’ll turn out like me, after all, you’re my son
He closes his eyes as his father’s voice grows still
I will not be like him- I will make something of myself, I will, I will
And finally, in the midst of all these unfamiliar faces, here I sit, taking it all in.
Isn’t it funny how much one can pick up just on a whim?
I happened to think about someone other than myself for once
I learned more things than I had in months
Suddenly, the light changes, going from dark red to bright green in a flash.
Stay, don’t go, I want to ask
And for one instant nobody moves, it’s as if life itself has been put on pause
Then, at once, they remember their cause
And they’re going, going, going, gone
I feel sad watching them go, I don’t want to move on
I feel like I know them, like we were friends
I don’t want this to end
I want to kiss the woman’s cheek and tell her to keep fighting her illness
Giving up now would be the opposite of harmless
I want to say do you know how truly blessed you are
To have a man who loves you more than his whole heart
To have lived over half your life with your soul mate
The man who still resembles the little boy you met at age eight
Always be grateful for the same young man who took you to prom
And fell more in love with you all night long
Recall the same man who wed you four falls after
And always filled you with laughter
Watch each one of your children come into this Earth,
And this man, now a daddy, say this is more than what I deserve
No matter what the test screens show
One only has to look at you to know
You’re a living miracle
Everything you’ve made, all you’ve done, it’s incredible
Look at the love and family that is sensational
What you’ve been through is simply motivational
You’re an angel and can never truly die
Too many people love you to forget your extraordinary life
I want to hug the small brunette teen who is still a child herself
Even though she feels like her life is on a shelf
She fought for this baby
No one promised to help her, the daddy never even said maybe
But one day, sometime down the road,
She’ll meet the one who will lift her heavy load,
Who will look at her with love, acceptance, and compassion in his eyes
For this child now a woman really has tried
To be a good mother, the best she knows how
And to always, always, make her daughter proud
No matter how many jobs she has to take
She will never regret the consequence her choice has made
Because what she thought was the end turned out to be the beginning
And really she feels as if she is winning
She will make it through and she will smile while doing it
She could not ever leave her child or quit
She never imagined she could love someone so much
But when she held her the first time, she just barely touched
Her perfect fingers and toes
And tiny little nose
And, right before the doctor whisked her away
She whispered the three words for the first time that day
I love you
This was true
I want to pat the back of the successful youth
You aren’t him, I’d say, you’re you
Don’t live in his past, embrace your future
You’re always going to wonder why he had to be such a loser
And you’re always going to love him, no matter what you say
Because he’ll always be your dad at the end of the day
You wish he would have been around to see you grow
You would have made him proud, you know
But it’s his loss that he never got to see
The incredible man that you turned out to be
As much as you think so, you’re really not like him at all
You have so much greatness in you that he never saw
But your mother did and she worked so hard
To make you see that you don’t always need to put up your guard
Because there are people in the world that love you for you
And don’t need you to give any proof
Like your best friend, the one that you’ve come to love
She’ll take you, scarred as you are, because she sees the beauty beneath the rough
She knows how hard life has been on you
But she also knows how much you can and will do
So don’t wait too long
To make her your wife
There are just some things you have to take in life
To make yourself happy, and just to survive
Don’t shut yourself off and let your guard show
Remember how your mom said this is not your fault you know
Forget about him, and look at your mom
How she loves you so much, and constantly says you did nothing wrong
She has worked all her life to build you back up
To repair all the damage done by one man she’d say that’s life, pup
Your mama always said you’d make it through
And look at what a great job she’s done with you
So here I am to say
You’ll do a great job today
And don’t give up just because he did
Come on, man, live
I want to touch the mother’s arm and say stop worrying
You’re always flurrying
You never think you’re good enough
You’re just almost out of luck
You’re always so afraid of making everything perfect
You’ve missed out on the things that count, the imperfects
It’s okay if there are dirty dishes in the sink
Look at what you have, stop and just think
Your husband misses the funny, beautiful, blushing girl he wed
Your seven year old son won’t always want you to tuck him into bed
Stop picking him apart
Look at his heart
So similar to your old one and yet so unique
His young spirit has not even started to peak
Forgive the drunk driver who took your baby girl
Your baby girl with her blonde curls
The thief who took her stole your happiness as well and made you this way
Because of the life-changing act that happened that day
I know her sweet spirit will forever haunt you
But think about the people who are still alive with you
Go back to them, before it’s too late
Before it’s them you start to hate
Remember what you used to say
Life isn’t about the perfect things, it’s the imperfects that make the day
Move on, they need you
They miss you
Yet I don’t say any of this as I watch them go
I feel as if I should let them know
That I hope they take my advice
Because I want them to be alright
They turn in all different directions and I know I’ll never see them again
This seems almost like a sin
I guess I’ll never really know if what I thought about them was true
But see how much you realize when you think of someone other than you
I saw other people’s need for understanding
And I wished I could stay close at hand
Maybe I everything I thought about them was wrong
It was like singing the words to an unfamiliar song
But as I sat there under that red light
I thought again maybe I was right