Rapunzel Meets Her Match


Prince, Prince, let down your beard to me

I've never been kissed by someone so hairy

My mom is on me to find a man to love

I was trespassing and saw your stubble above

I looked for a door or a window to breach

But I couldn't find any within my short reach

So, let me climb your out of control goatee

We'll marry right away and start our family




Woman, you're crazy if you think I'll give in

And let you climb the hairs on my chin

It would hurt too bad to bear your weight

That's not my idea of a fun first date

Go get a fireman's ladder or a witch's broom

Otherwise, you can forget me being your groom



I have a stick of dynamite in my hand

I'll level your tower unless you meet my demand

Cut off your beard and I'll make it into a nest

To catch your fall when you jump from your crest


Prince (to himself):

This lady is nuts and she's not messing around

She'll do anything to get me on the ground

I would be her prisoner in marriage no doubt

It would be worst than this tower, no way, I'm out

I've got to come up with a plan and quick

Before she gets antsy and lights that fire stick

I've got it; I'll weave my beard into a carpet

I'll fly down there and then she'll regret it

I'll blind her with those thorns by the garden gate

She'll have to realize that I'm not her soul mate


Rapunzel (after her mother's spell wears off):

Prince, I don't know what got into me

It might have been the medicine I took at 3

I will get off your property and leave you alone

Please forgive me for my threatening tone

Good day, dear sir, I'm gone like the wind

I hope one day you'll consider me a friend



Although we had an unfortunate and rocky start 

For some reason, I don't want you to depart

Let's start over and try to undo this wretched fail

And rewrite the story into a happy fairy tale



Sounds good, but seriously you've got to get a door or something!





















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