I wasn’t fortunate with the good work ethic genes
so school was never my forte.
I have never been popular,
even with the advantage of having a twin.
Grades were proficient, homework a bore.
We go through years of misery but what for?
School doesn’t test your knowledge or comprehension,
it tests your capability to memorize.
But once that test is over,
those vocabulary words and math formulas go away.
At least that’s with me.
They’re doing it wrong, don’t you agree?
It’s like a revolving door,
new bullies enter as the old ones leave.
Moving on to the next grade with the same people, same insults.
The only escape is hogging a stall in the schools bathroom.
Why are people so quick to make judgements and assume?
Gossip going up and down every hallway the school supplies.
Rumors spreading but you and I both know they’re lies.
Peer pressured into dating because if you’re single,
there’s obviously something wrong with you.
Thoughts clouding a girls mind, “You’re ugly”, “You’re fat”
I’m just a teenage girl. Why do I have to think like that?
What is school to me?
Well I left public school in the second semester of 8th grade.
Because I thought if I didn’t leave then, I wouldn’t be here now.
Everyday I still struggle.
I’m behind in school because I’m still effected by the past.
I may be sheltered now, but my thoughts and disorders still last.
Due to how our society regards beauty, I failed miserably.
Because of the way I dressed and how much I weighed at the time,
I was eyed with disdain.
The only time I was adept in school, was in drama and choir.
Still, bullying never failed,
I got called a mic hog every time I inhaled.
Don’t get me wrong, being a twin has its perks.
but with its pros, comes its cons.
The worst offender being comparison.
as in, “Who’s smarter” “She’s nicer.”
as in, “She’s prettier” , “She’s thinner”
but that’s only because she skips breakfast, lunch and dinner.
School is a war zone.
Students being recruits,
and of course there are victors.
But someone has to lose for another to win
and I think I can say I’m still fighting.
Though my days right now are bitter,
if there’s anything I know about myself,
it’s that I’m not a quitter.
When will they learn that it factors in with depression.
Kids keep quiet because they don’t want others to think it’s for attention.
Unfortunately many parents can’t afford a therapy session.
Their child's suicide leads into question.
Is it worth it?
The price we pay for education.