Poet's Story

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Truth be known this is a poet’s story

Of agony, pain

Glorified dismissal

Acceptance at the blow of a whistle

That as we speak a child is forcibly falling to their knees

In retribution for not being good enough

Strong enough

Not knowing that there is no time long enough

To heal the wounds of a broken soldier

That is misunderstood but heard

Misheard but understood

In those moments

That pain they hated feels good

It feels real

Feels like it feels

Understanding the depth of mind numbing silence

Self-inflicted violence

And untold lies and truth

This is a poet’s story

Unable to speak loud enough

To make sound enough for somewhere to hear

Someone to fear

For I’d rather be feared than be full of fear

Of my shadow and reflection

Life has taught many lessons

None my sticky than hatred

Lessons and lesions leaving my mouth tasteless

Unable to grasp the sweet sound waves of my loveliness

The loveliness that doesn’t exist inside of this

That is beside of this

Because society teaches the loveliness of a woman is between her pussy lips

As they grasp the erect hatred of a man to make her cry out in agony

Perpetuating hatred as a trip down love’s lanes

To make it seem as if you should enjoy the pain

This is a poet’s story

Laughing hysterically

As knives flow over the skin slowly

Cutting not deep but just enough

For the truth to flow

As your blood changes colors

As it drips towards the floor

Shifting itself into your personality

Leaving your heart upon a stage

Called reality

As you stare an audience unsure of your presence

Feeling invisible but spotlighted at the same time

Contradicted and confused

Your life story makes the front page news

Distorted and reworded

Like they took your life and made it into a fictional directional guide of disparaging disgust

Like if your pain wasn’t painful enough

And lay there staring at your own wounds

Covered in your own disrespect

As you morph yourself into someone else

Someone more comfortable

Someone more relatable

Relatable to the fakeness

And fuckery

And foolishness

And lack of loveliness that surrounds

Because society says the loveliness of a man lies in his ability to be angry but controlled

To be loose but locked up

That his loveliness lies in the ability to be suppressed and oppressed but convince himself that he is free

And in that moment

You realize this is a poet’s story

That someone in the world

Is a child inside of an adult

Remembering the shoves of despair

As she opens her legs for another pair

Pair of shoes

Pair of advancement

Pair of checks

Pair of minimal respect

That to get respect you must give respect

But once that respect is gone you have nothing left

And therefore no one, no longer respects you

Rejection at the hands of your owner

Who whispers love lines to make your skin feel warmer

To inject life into your deadly spiel of nothingness

That amongst those things of life

Lies nothingness

And there’s someone laughing hysterically

As your pain doesn’t match theirs

As your pain isn’t painful enough

Isn’t painful enough to be reported as told

But prodded and molded

And touched

And molested

And raped

Into a new story

Full of fear and agony

Full of disgust and unfairness

As if living life as it is, is justice

Its just us

Just us who feel it

Just us who get it

Just us who remember what it was that made us into these vessels of speaker boxes

And microphones

Who cords connect to turn us on

To be heard

To be seen

To no longer be invisible

To for once feel lovely

To feel lovely for our intelligence

Not for a perpetuation of others superiority

For more than our sex

For more than our ability to be suppressed

For us this is a poet’s story

Just us and lack of justice

As somewhere in the world

A person kneels down on their knees

To pray

To fuck

To suck

To die

To live

To breathe

To suffocate

Under the weight of their own capabilities

Somewhere in the world

Is another person reciting on a soap box

To an audience of just one

Somewhere this is justice

For more than just us

This is a poet’s story

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