An Open Letter to my rapist
To the man who took my innocence:
To the man, Im sorry that gives you too much credit, to the boy who took my innocence when I was only 13
I remember that first day all too clearly
I went with a friend, to get another friend from his house. You were there.
You needed to "talk to me", I went not thinking you were about to burn my world up
I went with trust for you in my heart. It was a small subdivision. Surely everyone was sweet
You mustve told the boys to leave, why didn't they save me?
You threw my head against a wall
All i remembered was waking up next to you bloody and naked
I threw on clothes, climbed out your window since your door wouldnt budge
I cut my leg on that rusty nail.
I ran. God did I run for my life passing through the park to go home. No one stopped to check on me
They seemed to get out the way.
I thought the hell was over. Oh god was I wrong
You proceeded to hunt me down and take my innocence 2 more times that week
You took my innocence when I was in a haze. I lost a dear loved one just 3 months prior
You took my self love
You took my drive
My ambitions
My soul
I was a lifeless shell of a person
I couldnt clean you off me
I couldnt cut you off me
I couldnt let a man touch me again
To this day I am jumpy
You took so much from me
But you gave me so much as well
You gave me the ability to fight
You taught me to keep my guard up
You taught me that I can survive hell
You may have taken everything I held close to me
You almost took my life in the form of suicde
But you didnt. I survived
8 years later I am here writing this
8 years later I have became a voice for the victims.
You gave me the ability to help others
I am much more than your victim
I will always be more than a victim
It almost killed me but I am now stronger. I now have a burning fire in my soul to fight
I will fight to never be victimized again. I will become a voice for other victims