One Hundred Sixty Six Days


United States
43° 13' 34.8528" N, 72° 46' 7.7628" W

I wrote every secret I had on the bathroom wall.
In hope that one day someone would paint over them and I could forget.
Car keys scratch more than just the surface, any city lover could tell you that.
You can wait for years as time goes on and you stay the same,
and I'll wait coloring the past on cafe napkins with used sharpies,
letting them feel what its like to be trampled unnoticed by the entire world.

Except for you,

your hope for humanity is unbreakable.
You pick each one up folding them into tattered hearts with heel marked seals.

I have no rhythm,
you laugh as I twirl around the daylight.
You hide in the shadows scared,
worried that someone might actually notice your shades of grey.
I smile as you wait for something profound,
yet to notice it's already surrounding you.

We are frayed,

with knotted strings that everyone wants to wrap around their fingers
and pull like eager children/
Its not so bad though is it.

You sit opposite of me,
I touch the glass leaving scars of greasy finger prints trailing to the door.
You can't come home again,
I can't leave.
Something new every month,
you're finding yourself in the way you hoped you could.
You're finding yourself filling the cracks between you and I,
with more than just distance.

You're home this week.

I'm the sand in this story
and your the molten lava,
i just hope in the end I turn out

Another funeral for another day.
We are all growing up and dying off.
It's our second nature after all.

There are not enough cliche words to say exactly how I ache for you.
There will never be enough phrases to ask for you to come home.
I don't have faith,
you don't have time.

I feel unnatural,
how can something be that isn't.
I'm not like them I tell myself
as we all sync into thoughts about being different.
I have a perception they don't.
Like every other lonely girl dreaming of fairy tails in cold bath water.

Give me a reason to stay!
Pretending someone somewhere is listening.
I'm a sideshow freak,
my caravan is leaving tonight.
How else can I define myself with out you?
Wait you never were my definition,

You were my link to something bigger.
The road, it leaves an impression on those stuck in its wake.
No one forgets the side show girl
with the troubling smile,
no one remembers her name in the end.
I'm fine with that.

No one needs to remember.


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