Once I Saw Myself

Once I saw myself upon a cloud

Of trust I was a champion proud.

But then the night came

              And the dark stole away

The light that returned not with the day.

 

In shadows I saw the void I never left,

              Saw the claws still reaching through

The hollows filled with ice from which I made a shield and black frosted spear

When I returned not a soul came round

to see me now as I was anew

And when I marched into new, unknown halls, the people clamored about in fear

Ne’er did I raise my sword, but my heart whispered

              As a whirling, dancing blade

And when I stood before those well known to me, none saw what darkness made:

              Terror forged in fear, trust burned for flame,

                             Ice formed to keep them at bay.

              And the love that did not return with the day.

 

 

Once I saw myself upon a throne

Adored by subjects yet still alone.

And I paid no mind

              And became so blind

To how the silence burned and I pined

 

In the mirror I saw myself as I had become

              And harried to draw the curtains

Long ere I tarred as my fingers plucked the drapes but in the end I fled

The crown and cape for which I fought shouldered and

displayed the weight of my burdens

Metal trinkets and jewelry were my heart’s portrayal: cold and warped and dead.

In my head I saw a thousand fractals reflect

the dread truth unveiled

In my mission, in my being, in my own given purpose I had failed.

              In shadows I made broken puppets dance

                             Because trust I gave no chance

              How dare I dream of a love perchance?

 

(Once I saw myself in a dream

Haunting the night and reigning supreme

And when came the day

              It couldn’t go away

Because in life there’s a price to pay)

 

 

Once I saw myself at an edge

I jumped but grabbed the ledge

Dangling in the air

              Weighted by despair

I could hear a song so hopeful, so fair

 

Light, joy, and a new day, new future rang

              In that rising, rolling melody

Where once I had borne the weight of wrongs past repair, bright new wings grew for me

I shed the skin bruised by guilt, mistrust, and anger

and from their grasp was free

no more threatened by drowning, swept under in that churning emotional sea

With one great push, I left behind in the wind

              The pain of words said

I rose through the sky to my kingdom of clouds, in triumph held high my head.

              Into the morn, it was time to move on

The dark of the past was gone

              A new future lay beyond the blooming dawn

Comments

Additional Resources

Get AI Feedback on your poem

Interested in feedback on your poem? Try our AI Feedback tool.
 

 

If You Need Support

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741