Not Who You Wanted, An original poem by Eva F. Lammlin

Who you wanted

Wasn’t who I was

And I couldn’t turn into them

No Matter how hard I tried

You wanted the Ocean

I was a River

You wanted the Sun

I was just the Clouds

You wanted the Solar System

I was Pluto

I tried changing myself

I was now a Lake

But now you wanted the River

I molded myself into the sky

But all you saw was the clouds

I raised myself to be Jupiter

Just so I’d be big enough

For you to realize my changes

But you can’t even see me

You’ve locked eyes with Saturn


I moped around for weeks

Realizing I couldn’t be who you wanted

No matter how hard I tried

I decided to think about what I wanted

I wanted a Book

You were just the spine

I wanted Coffee

You were just the Cup

I wanted a Rose

You were just a Tulip

I forgot about myself

Because I was thinking about you

We aren’t right for eachother

And we never will be


It’s been a few days

And i’ve noticed another girl

She’s exactly what I wanted

She’s a book

Not just the pages

She’s Hot Coffee

Not just the beans

She’s a Bright Red Rose

Not just the Thorns

But she’s not the same as before

I can tell

She used to be a vintage, and damaged book

She used to be an iced coffee

And she had more thorns than petals

When I asked her why

She said it was for me

She must’ve seen the look on my face

She told me

I saw you chasing the girl

That couldn’t make up her mind

I knew you weren’t thinking of you

I may have changed

But it wasn’t for only you

I wanted to be the real me

And this is her


I asked my perfect girl what she wanted

She wanted the River inside me

Not the Lake I created

She wanted The clouds In my soul

Not the painted sky in my eyes

She Wanted Pluto, It was unique

Not something as big and scary as Jupiter

I realized

I was chasing the confused girl

While she was chasing the real me

While I was changing myself

She only wanted



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