i Never believe anyone
when they tell me they will stAy;
you're the reason i don't tRust,
why my doors remain Closed.
you haunt me durIng sleep,
timeS i am free,
torment my soul with anguiSh,
leave me in utter despaIr.
a pain my inSides are trained
to ignore and push away To my
subconscious Mind, a
plAce i can't reach awake,
unlesS i am prepared.
nO thought of you shall interrupt
my Clarity or confuse my
inner being from wHere it is
I plan on getting to but
i hate that you're such a narcissiSt,                                                                                                      and i am such a masochisT...

who loves you with every drop of her blood, every tear from her eyes,
every vision of her future, and every ounce of mercy in her heart.
i am a masochist for loving a narcissist,
who only loves the image in the mirror,
who only has time to give to those in physical proximity because he can't go that extra mile for anyone.
i am a masochist who yearns for the attention of a narcissist
who never looks anywhere but at a reflection of him,
who doesn't think i am worthy to be looked at,
spoken to,
listened to.
I AM A MASOCHIST YEARNING FOR THE ATTENTION OF A NARCISSIST;
an egotistical monster whose
image is above everything,
who thinks himself a god
worthy of ass kissing and worship!
I am a masochist who loves a narcissist,
but refuse to have my own ego shattered again…
I am just like that narcissist,
too proud to give in.
I am a masochist,
who loves a narcissist,
and in the end I'm just like him…

my strong image is too important to ever reveal he brings me pain,

and that I love it.

I am a masochist in pain that smiles at others in vain although like the Biblical Cain he kills me...

while my narcissistic interior wallows in self-pity, my masochist exterior embraces pain,

or is it the exact opposite?

Am I an internal masochist that accepts pain, and external narcissist that hides it?