My Once Super Mom

I miss when my mom was my superhero. 
When I was 5 and looked in a mirror,
and said I want to be like her. 
She could do anything.
No problem was too big a thing.
She worked to help me. 
She worked to provide for me.
She helped me with homework,
treating me like the daughter 
she said she wanted. 
She provided me with a childhood,
not the best, but it was good.
She provided me with an education, 
and although we never had vacation,
I never knew about our financial trouble.
She hugged me when I was sad. 
She helped me when I was mad,
and could tell when something was wrong. 
She cared for others,
and knew everything. 
I'm seventeen now. 
My mom is not a superhero
I do not look in the mirror
and wish to be like
the broken woman
who struggles everyday 
just to remember her name
or the day of the week.
She leans on me 
for everything;
Help with everyday things,
and never thanks me. 
She treats me like I'm replaceable,
and then gets mad when I leave.
She is a 56 year old woman
with the mental capacity 
of a 5 year old child.
She hopes to still be a mother, 
but instead of discipline,
she dishes out insults.
Instead of hugs and love
I get screams,
which she was once above. 
I don't know what happened. 
It was a sudden change. 
I used to be able to trust her.
Now I can't. 
I used to be able to lean on her. 
Now I can't. 
She needs me now,
But she won't admit it. 
I used to love her,
but now I see her as a burden. 
Someone I have to care about,
because we are related by blood. 
But she is not my superhero. 
She is not the strongest person I know. 
She doesn't know everything. 
She isn't my mother anymore.


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