My Life

Fri, 01/17/2014 - 20:12 -- TayJ19

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As a kid having fun was all that I knew how to do.

Love, peace, and happiness.

A few scratches and band-aids,

cards from every classmate on Valentine's Day,

sleepovers with friends and laughs that will never end.

That all ended soon. Sooner than I thought it would.

Middle school, my life changed.

13 year old Breast Cancer Survivor.

The teasing, harsh comments, feeling out of place.

I didn't feel like a teenager anymore. I didn't feel like myself.

I wasn't having fun like I knew how to do.

"Why Me?" is what I often asked and wondered.

Everyday I would fake a smile. At night I would just let it all out.

Tears of pain, confusion, frustration.

"You should be proud. You will inspire people", is what I was told.

Inside I felt empty, lonely, misunderstood.

Knowing that the cancer can reoccur at anytime didn't make it any better for me.

I felt like giving up.

As I grew older, I understood more.

I accepted the fact that I was now a "Breast Cancer Survivor."

I accepted the questions and thoughts.

I accepted that my body is not going to develop how I want it to.

I accepted being DIFFERENT.

Best feeling ever.

Being labeled as a hero, an idol, strong and brave.

Seeing myself motivate others helped me develop a voice of my own.

When I look at myself I am sometimes unsatisfied.

Then I think "Others have it worse. I went through this battle and conquered it for a reason".

Ever heard the saying "God gives his strongest soldiers the toughest battles"?

That's how I imagine myself. 

A strong soldier that made it through one of the toughest battles.

I learned to love more.

I learned to accept who I really am. 

I am stronger.

I am wiser.

I am better.

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