There I laid as the darkness of the night crept in through the windows and proceeded to engulf my body into it's rich depth.
It was swallowing the details of my bedroom.
I could no longer see much except for about a foot perimeter around me.
I had been laying there motionless, except for the slow and steady breaths I was taking, for over four hours now.
My thoughts were the only active aspect of me at the time...
Creating scenarios that were unlikely to happen- Both good and bad,
Even looking in retrospect at the humiliating thing called, "My Life"
It may be strange to say that this "darkness" has become comforting,
However, it has.
She is the only thing that stays constant in my everyday life.
She is there when I'm at school.
She is there, sitting next to me, at church.
She is there helping me blow out my birthday candles year after year.
She is there when I cry in bed at night.
She is stagnant.
It started slowly, then all at once.
She'd show up a day here, then a few days there.
She latched onto my skin and began to follow me from place to place.
Soon, the darkness is not only consuming my skin, but my mind.
Whenever I do my best to evacuate this dark friend,
She does her best to inch her way back into my mind.
Even when the companion is being fought by medications and hours of therapy,
She stays there, in my mind.
I'm her favorite home.
Some may say that having this friend holding my hand day by day is a tragedy.
Although, they don't seem to realize that this friend made me who I am today.
I've learned the lesson that life will not always be easy.
I've grown to be stronger because of her.
I was made an individual because of her- She set me apart from the others.
She may not be a good friend,
But, everyone has a bad friend from time to time.
That is why I continue to lay in bed with her as the darkness turns into day and as the sun reveals the details of my room.