My Depression said to say hello
My Depression said to say hello, and that she's sorry we've never formally
met, she said she was too disgusted by me to bring me any sooner, that I
was a horrible creature that had hope, and she had to make sure every last
vile bit of that was gone. My Depression told me that I would have to tell
you about our type of relationship and how it affects me, so, I'd like to
start now.
When I was thirteen, my Depression said it was time to vacate the primises
of my person, she didn't care how, to just do it. But some angels said that it
would get better, to just give it some time and they would prove it.
My Depression decided to go on vacation for two and a half years.
I thought that during this time away I was getting stronger and she weaker,
but it was the other way around. When she came back I crumbled,
my bed became a fortress I could not escape, and nor did I want to.
But Depression wasn't that subtle, people started to notice ssomething
was wrong. I told them I was fine, over and over again, and it hurt so
bad when they finally believed me. When did I agree to covering up
for Depression? This was her own fault, I shouldn't be to blame.
I got so angry at her, she left for a few weeks. She came back at the
most unaprontune time, triggered by something someone said that
wouldn't leave my mind. And it went on like this, then she said
that it was time to meet you, that you were her friend, and that makes
you my friend as well.
My Depression said to write this, so I did. My Depression said to give
up, so I did. My Depression said to stop breathing…but I can't, I just
can't. Please I'm not trying to rebel or cause trouble, please don't tell
my Depression that I didn't listen, please don't tell her, my
Depression will kill me! If she finds out I decided to keep living.
My Depression said to say hello, but I won't, at least not right now.
And you, you tell my Depression to try harder next time.