To My Butterflies
Location
I see you
When you think you’re invisible
When you’ve been ignored one time too many
When you reach for that blade
To take away the pain
To make it all fade
To just forget
And as you watch the familiar crimson
Stream across your tender skin
So gentle
And you pray no one will notice
I see you
I hear you
Your silent screams
Shushed by the world
As they called you every name in the book
Bitch
Slut
Lesbian
And the more you cried out
The worse it got
And nobody heard
Or else nobody even cared
But you have to let it all go now
Because they were wrong
It was never true
They didn’t know you
They’ll never know what it’s like to be you
Yet here you are today
Still wondering why everyone chose not to hear
Still struggling to process their words
Every single day
And they’ll never know the way they hurt you
They’ll never hear your cries
Not through your protests of
“I’m okay”
“The cat got my arm”
“Really, I’m good”
But we both know you’re not
I can hear the cracks spreading through your entire being
Every time you speak those lies
I hear what you really mean
“I’m falling apart”
“Help me”
Yes, I hear you
And I understand
The way it hurts
The shame
And the relief as that sharp sting penetrates
All those lies
And all that pain
If only for a moment
I know the deceit
To the ones you love most
The ones who could help
You know you can’t do it alone
And you know it’s only a matter of time
Before your walls come crashing down
But you’re stuck
Too far gone it seems
I know the way you hate yourself
Unable to stand a look in the mirror
Thinking you’ll never be good enough
Yes, I understand
Because you’re not invisible
Not silent
Not alone
And you don’t have to do this anymore