If I told you I was suicidal would you believe me?
Maybe I don't cut, and maybe I don't attempt,
but I sure do think about it every waking moment.
The smile on my face everyday is deceiving to you but also myself.
In school the bridge down the street seems like a great escape.
At home the deep stream just a block away tastes irresistible.
I sit and sulk and inhale the thoughts in my head saying "you're not going to make it through the night".
As I sit in darkness before I fall asleep, I cry reminiscing about the times I've wasted thinking about death, rather than living my life.
I believe that this 365 days to come will be different.
I hope to god I will still be alive, and in search for that thing I lost touch with; my happiness.
I know once that it is found, I'd be ready for death to come, because I know I'd die with a smile in my face.