I wish I could share
the euphoria I get when
It feels as if I’m apart from my body.
It’s like a million birds singing with me,
In my mind, it’s a melody.
A manic melody.
The doctors say this isn’t healthy,
And that my mind is weaponry.
They don’t understand me.
I don’t even understand me.
All I know is that I wouldn’t ever hurt a thing.
Though I may have made my own arm bleed.
The melody starts to scream,
It isn’t harmonious anymore.
But in my mind it’s a symphony.
A depressing symphony.
I’m hurting, but I’m smiling.
Isn’t it concerning?
You would never guess a thing was wrong with me.
Because it’s something you can’t see, it’s something
that goes on within me.
I swallow the pills they give me, but I become a zombie.
The extended release fills my body, and I am no longer me.
I realize this is why I’ve stopped taking the meds they gave me.
They think they stabilize me, but they destroy me.
They change the way I think.
Society wants to mask me, but I just want to be free.
Wouldn’t you just accept me?