A boy

Born in a wooden shed

up on a mountain in old Ireland

The mother

A woman

A name never known

Died delivering him to his new home

A man

Owner of the shack

Found him in the back

As wrinkly as a prune

On a hot day in June

He got out a knife

To cut off the foreskin

But the kid was so wrinkly 

It blew off from the wind

The man found it funny and named him

Rumplestiltskin

 

3 years later 

he's in school

3 feet high

acting like a fool

One time on a July morning 

Caught eating another's porridge

Sent to the wheel with a spool of thread

Told to make sweaters till the day ends

but when he tried to make clothes for the cold

he found out he could make them out of gold

So one by one he would stitch

Sweaters that could make anyone rich

But at the end of the day they thought he was a witch

 

The king

Kind and fair

Could not remove the fowl stench in the air

For the townsfolk thought death was the only way

To get rid of the evil found yesterday

The king found a solution that would keep Rumplestiltskin alive

" Give everyone in town a golden sweater and you'll be free of this endeavor"

but there were too many people and not enough tread

to prevent him from being dead

20 years exile instead

 

20 years later 

He came back to town

3 feet high 

he came back down

 

New town

New people

Found him the odd sort

Asked him

Why he's so short

 

" My father, filled with grief,

drank booze for relief

Three nights into exile

In a drunken spell

Pushed me down our well

Broke my pelvis 

and both legs

I cried through the night

Wasn't found till next morning 

He pulled me up with the bucket

terrified then relieved

Fully recovered 

3 years later

my growth was stunted

three feet stuck forever"

 

One day in late July

He heard a noise

Sobbing in a cellar

Under a castle

 

Curiosity filled his mind

pity filled his heart

he seeked out the noise

he found it

a woman

" Good morning, why are you crying" he asked

an impossible task

" I have to spin straw to gold you see or tomorrow death will come to me"

 

He would have done this task for free

but you see

he can't make a living

or even a shilling

for even though he can make gold

he's still treated as an exile

for his stature and abilities 

Make people afraid

that if they buy his gold

their blood would run cold

 

He gave her a requirement

" An item in exchange for service"

She gave him a necklace 

He gave her service

A days worth of gold

Should keep her blood 

From running cold

 

He went downtown

bartered apple for necklace

went back to the mountains 

For the rest of the day

 

Next day

same woman

same impossible task

same requirement

She gave him a ring

He gave her service

A days worth of gold

yet again

 

He went down

bartered ring for bread

and two apples

He went to the mountains 

rest of the day

yet again

 

Same woman

same situation 

different requirements 

She had nothing left to give him

so he thought of something wild

a child

for he had always wanted one

to give the love 

his father never did 

to teach his wildest ways

and to never be afraid 

for he couldn't have one

because of the fall

for they believed

the pelvis

ruptured his area

and made him infertile

 

He gave her the requirements

" service for the firstborn"

she accepted his offer

both unsure if it will ever happen 

he gave his service 

the same result

and went back to the mountains 

 

One year later

he came down again

he found out

she was queen 

and had a child

surprised

he asked the guards

to see the queen

they called him a freak

told him to leave

 

winded up

from the brutes

he took a different route

came to the chamber

queen with child

upset she had forgotten 

her promise

she cried

she begged

guilty of the way he acted

He gave her three days

to guess his name

for no one could get it right

cause it was really weird

and sometimes he wondered

if his father had more than just beer

 

He left the castle

back up into the mountains 

came down the next morning

 

She guessed common names 

" Dave, Joe, Fred "

He shook his head

went back into the mountains 

came down the next morning 

 

She guessed names

even he found weird

" Slackjaw, Toothache, Goldbeard"

He shook his head

glad those weren't his

that his father 

wasn't THAT drunk

when he named him

 

He went back to the mountains

and with delight

got drunk that night

 

He sang a tune

around the fire

Then fell down unconscious 

unaware that someone was watching

 

" Today I bake bread

Tomorrow I make soup

for a little child

one year new

I hope to be

as kind as I can

for now there's a child

for old rumplestiltskin!"

 

He came down that morning 

one last time

surprised

she guessed his name

the third time

 

He tore his shirt with grief

for he knew defeat

and will never get the child he seeked

 

But he felt like

he'd been deceived 

For when she said his name

She said it confidently 

So before he left 

To go to the mountains 

He spilled the beans

to the king

 

The king

Hearing his statement 

needed proof

for an accusation 

against his beloved queen

 

The servant

Gave Rumplestiltskin

Straw and thread

With it

he gained the kings favor tenfold

in front of him

He made a dress out of gold

 

He couldn't put his queen on trial

For he needed a mother for their child

So for forgiveness

He gave Rumplestiltskin land

and a million

 

And on it he would make

millions more

for his act for the king

revealed to the world

his true talent

 

royalty

from all kingdoms

would seek him out

for the finest of clothing 

In exchange for the finest of riches

 

Eventually a Frenchman

He became royal himself 

And on his deathbed

He found out

He wasn't completely infertile

after all

For he found out

He had a child

But his shortness

may have been inherited 

For twenty years after his death 

His child became

The great NAPOLEON!