Sometimes I feel like I could love everyone. Like, actually, love them. Sexually, emotionally, you know, feel a connection that a lover feels in lust, and in falling and in connecting in love. It’s like one simple look; a meeting of the eyes, and I’m there. I know it. I feel it. We could probably fall in love, I think to myself. A quick glance and I sense it: I could feel deeply for this person. It’s so real for me. In my head. 

It’s not necessarily that I dwell in alternative universes for hours on end. More like, I see imaginary screenshots of my alternative life’s movie on pause. Movies where I pick a different Prince Charming and happily ever after looks like an entirely different me with all the same fulfilling love feelings.

Bizarre.

And maybe I’m just good at make believe; or maybe I’m conceited. Like, really? Anyone could love me back the way I would love them. 

Could I really? 

Or is this all lust. taking a hold on my heart with its strong hands I want to touch and feel and grab onto, passionately.

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