When my days end
I will still love you
I still hold you in my heart
Even though you gnaw away at it
Without any thought
Sometimes i feel an unmeasurable feat when i look at you
An unexplained rage when i look at you
Yet never pure hate.
I just wish i never met you
I wish i had a reason to stop loving you in the first place
But you never actually had me
You had a shadow
That would hurt you if i didnt leave
I still think of you
I wonder if you’re okay
If your blood still flows and your breathing is at bay
Like when i would wake up next to you
I still miss you
I still want you in my ams
I want to feel your softer cheek and hand
But i cannot grasp you
Because i could never grasp myself
And every second i was with you, i refused to look for help.
I would hide from you.
But i never meant to deceive
Eventually, i realized, you were not what i would need.