Love, Fear, Hate

I remember the day we met

June 4th, 2011

I didn’t know then

What you’d put me through

The way you’d make me feel

Love, fear, hate

 

3 months later you were different

You started to get mad

Usually at the little things

You weren’t the guy I fell in love with

 

One day it was your birthday

I was so excited to see you again

But instead she got to see you

When I asked about her

You got defensive and said not to worry

But I did, everyday

 

Another 3 months later came along

I told you my dad died

You said you’d be there for me

But you were a no – show

 

Everyone told me to end it

But I thought I was in love with you

 

Your temper increased over time

The fear started to settle in

But when you’d calm down

You’d say “sorry” and “ I love you”

And that you’d change for the better

Instead, you got worse

 

You told me to pick between you and my friends

So I picked you

You said not to talk about it

So I never spoke a word

 

There we’re good days too

The days we didn’t fight

When you’d take me out on a date

Those were the days

That reminded me of how much I loved you

 

Everyone was so worried

But I felt so happy

 

Then you had to leave

You said you’d come back for me

But when you came home

She showed up with a ring

 

I didn’t understand why

Or what was happening

I finally spoke up and you got so angry

You made so many threats

I’d never been so scared in my life

 

I had to give you up and move on

Everyone was so happy

Except for me

Oh how I missed and craved you 

 

One day I realized what you did

Everything you put me through

All the lies

I finally felt free

Free from your control

And that’s when I began to hate you

 

I didn’t want you dead

Or any sort of revenge

I hated you for lying to her

She deserves so much better

 

I hope one day she realizes

The same thing I did so long ago.

 

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