First, I'm going to
"Look At Myself"
And tell you what I am
As I gaze out into the snowy sky, I can't help but wonder why, that in a life filled with love, and light, and joy; I'm such an unhappy boy. Am I malcontent? Longing for the days I was innocent?
Why do I force it on myself? I box up the truth of who I am, and throw it on a dusty shelf, somewhere in my mind where I have to search and search just to find, a glimpse of hope; of who I am. Of living things and promised land.
Why do I do this? Am I depressed? I'd ask my parents, but they say I'm just stressed. I'm not though. But every day my life's a show; curtains up, time to go! Wear this smile, wear this mask; long enough to do this task
I'm a fake; a con, a phony; full of lies and old baloney. And no matter how I try to change it, all I do is rearrange it. I hate it! I want it gone! But always it's the same old song; the one that tells me I'm so wrong. Why though!? Why am I wrong!?
Don't tell me I'm not right, then tell me I'm stupid and I'm not bright. Teach me! Make me feel! Reach into my heart and make me real! I hate being cold and alone, so plastic! I hate my brain, so confused, so spastic!
Show me myself again! The me who doesn't hide behind a pen. Who stands up for what he believes in and then, uses his voice, isn't afraid to be heard! The one who's odd. A sore thumb. A nerd. The me who knows it's no one else's choice. The me who has no silent voice. The me who knows me for who I am. Not this shut up hermit clam.
I need to stop clamming up! To stop saying yessir, no sir, yup! I'm not a servant to my own emotions. I'm a tidal wave, deeper than oceans.
I need to stop and think again, so that time will come and I'll know when, that I'm not invincible. I'm not very tough. But I've got love. And that's enough.
"Look At Yourself"
And see if you see what they see in me, in you.
Because they look at me like I'm just a face on Twitter; without the glitter, they think I'm a slitter; a quitter and a sitter. But I'm not. I'm a stander. An amphibious lander; able to adapt to whatever life brings. They will not silence me! Truth always sings!
They think I'm alone. But their eyes are not shown, me with my friends and family; my friends are family, and my family are friends.
Hate begins a cycle; but love's how it ends. And no matter how I hurt, this resolve never bends.
I am alive, and towards a goal I strive, to help others realize, that they too are alive; to open their eyes, and see the truth of who they are; to look back on how far, they've come. To look at their problems and see that they've won. That they've beaten addiction, when they had no prediction, and they thought they would lose. That they'd break down and once again use, that needle or that pill. But then they took a breath and realized that they are...still...clean.
Now to you this might not mean, much, but then how about grades? You sit and you work in a daze. You try to catch up but your mind's in a haze; because society, has told you that you're worth no more than those D's or those A's.
Stand up for yourself. Reach within and delve, down deep. Find the courage to tell yourself that you're worth more than a mark on a piece of paper; you are not two dimensional, you are not flat. You need to watch like a sentinel, for those who would tell you that, you are less than who you are; you are less than who you can be.
Now, you think that I don't relate, but listen to me; I may not know you as well as some people might, but at the end of the day when you lay down at night, I beg you...
Think back on what I've said 'cause I might just be right. Look in the mirror and see a beautiful sight; you. Yourself. One person. You can change the future. The one that matters; your own. And that's just a start. 'Cause if you reach down into your heart, and help someone else you will start, a change. A reaction. And it'll gain ground, increasing it's traction, until you. Have changed, the world.