A Letter to My Tears

A letter to my tears,

 

Why must you always leak from my eyes?

Slowly trailing down my face

And leaving a river -

A canyon, rather -

Inside my soul

 

In those moments

When you occupy my thoughts completely

I feel as if I am drowning

Drowning in a feeling I cannot fully explain

A feeling that surrounds my consciousness

Heavy

As if each drop

Is a thousand pound weight on my chest

 

Who is this girl?

Hiding in her room

Streaks down her face

Confused and alone

She isn’t me, is she?

I don’t even know who I am when you come to call, tears

I am not the smart girl, quiet in the back of the room

That my fellow students see

I am no longer sweet and bubbly and pink with laughter

As I look to my friends

Not unless a tear counts as a bubble

The responsible young lady that her family knows,

That girl disappears for the seconds, minutes, hours that I am drowning

 

No one sees us together

No one sees me lying on my bed with smiles forgotten

Any positive attribute of the day lost to the wind

The struggles that would normally stay bottled up inside me, never seen, never heard

Now plain as day on my face

I hate feeling this way

Helpless and out of control

Wondering if it will be okay again

 

So, tears, it would be appreciated

If you could leave me alone

 

Sincerely yours,

Hannah

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