Let Her Sink

Tue, 03/19/2019 - 22:34 -- melgr2

I took a deep breath while hearing her voice

Listening to my heart beating as my breathing accelerated

She had set limits

She had set goals

She had taken over all my hope

 

My skin was cold

I could feel the soft breeze

She had made me brittle, easily broken and sensitive

I could not succeed

I could not embark on my life journey

There was a wall where I had once seen a bridge.

 

“Ma’am!” I scream. “Ma’am! Why am I hurting in a world full of joy?”

But her answer was cold and obscure like the turbulent waters  .”Maybe you see joy where true pain is being hidden.”

 

And that was it.

I feared the eye of the neighbor for they may betray my soul

I feared the help I needed as it may deepen the wound

I feared the change to come as it may take away my love

And I feared myself as I may not be enough

 

“Let her sink!” I heard a deep and raspy voice say.

But “No!” I could not,  Fear was the only one I listened to.

She was my one

She had been there when I doubted when I cried, and when I hurt

Never did I think, she was just a knife on my wound

Preventing a hemorrhage while making it worse

 

And maybe, after all, it was time to let her sink

Let her drown in her ocean of lies

Be poisoned by her pessimism

Let her feel agony alone

And I did

 

And I took a deep breath

And I looked at the blue sky

And I listened to the calming waves, the sound of the wind playing with the palm trees

And I let the sun kiss me

 

And I embarked again, setting my eye on new shores

 

All because I let fear sink.

 

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