I can still smile, even if I feel pain. I want to utilize every moment I take a breath.

I

know he’s leaving again today.

The unexpected celebratory atmosphere is a large indicator.

Ultimately, I knew this was inevitable.

I wish it was different, and that he could stay.

 “Can

our family survive him being gone?”

I wonder silently.

However, I don’t feel panicked, because

this isn’t the first time he’s had to leave.

My spirit is

Still.

 I’m determined to make this easier for him.

I know that he’s hurting more than he lets me see.

I know I’m only a child and

he doesn’t want to overwhelm me.

 

 

I

Smile

and send him off with a cheerful wave.

I enthusiastically hug him and say a silent prayer;

I’ll miss him more than I’ll ever say.

Even

if this is the last time I’ll see him,

at least his final memory of me

will be my smile.

I don’t want our parting words

to be those of anger

or bitterness.

If

he doesn’t come back,

I would always feel remorseful for

giving him an unpleasant memory.

I’ve decided that I’ll smile for him.

I

will cry and laugh for him.

He cherishes what he has,

and I won’t taint his demeanor with ungratefulness.

 I know deep down

he would

Feel

sad if I wasn’t happy.

If I didn’t continue my life,

and I disregarded all that life holds in store for me,

he would feel

Pain.

The respect I have for him

is profound enough

that if he wasn’t here

I wouldn’t be disheartened or ashamed.

I’m proud of what he does, and all he is. Truthfully,

I

 hope I can live up to his standard.

I would be more disappointed,

if I disregarded his sacrifice by not being all that I can.

There’s no need for me to be perfect,

I only have to live up to my own suppositions.

I

Want

to be strong for him.

I want to be happy, and enjoy the life I have.

If one looks at the world and only accedes the negative factors,

 then one is blind to the joys around them.

Each day holds its own surprises and revelations,

that are waiting to be discovered.

He doesn’t realize it, but he has taught me

 

To

appreciate life and all its perplexities.

The sky, earth, and the people that may not be here

tomorrow.

Wouldn’t it be tragic, if I missed something spectacular,

simply because I felt burdened by petty affairs?

I have to

Utilize

what I can, while it’s still here.

Every day there is a small change that occurs, be it in one’s heart,

or in one’s surroundings.

Nothing can possibly remain the same forever.

I can’t deny that

Every

story has an ending.

Some type of closure that leaves the reader satisfied.

A person’s life is similar to a story,

in the sense that each chapter holds

unforeseen twists and turns that enthrall the reader.

In my final

Moment

I want to be satisfied,

and without regret.

I do not want to die without having accomplished all I want to.

It’s okay to be immature and reckless sometimes.

Even if something I do is senseless and rash,

I would much rather know what the outcome is,

rather than be in suspense for the rest of my life.

I

am exactly who I want to be,

and my future is my own.

All I am is determined by me,

with chosen influence by others.

I’m free of any constrictions that bind society.

The only way to figure out who you are is to take risks

 and encounter what the world has to offer.  

The future is mine to

Take.

I’m not afraid to take risks.

I strive to be adventurous, and uncover the abundant mysteries

life withholds.

There’s no reason why I shouldn’t live the life I love and love the life I live.

I’m unafraid to take a

A

chance.

The world won’t remember me tomorrow unless

I carve my existence into stone,

and even that will fade eventually.

He has been a beacon of encouragement,

a strong hand to uphold me in my darkest hour.

In his honor,

 I will continue to smile,

and laugh,

until my final

Breath.